You need to have someone else. It's done after. Yes.
I am not interested in being around grizzly. Bears,
the bear caught up to the Moose and broke its back. Just fucking giant beasts just running through the camp. It's literally like a machine that
crushes. Moose bones. Oh, gosh, that polar bear.
Smells that man's
meat. Have you?
Ever been to a Furry Convention.
You don't you do it first
guest step, you know.
To start out with a banger. He is the only Joe that should be running this country.
Okay. A man with a
leg kick so hard he could snap lizzle thigh. How
you seen him on? NBC. You've seen him on UFC you've seen him on trt. He is the man. Okay, stone-cold stuck in Austin himself.
Let's go, my brother. You guys have overcomplicated the podcast? You had a good thing going. You guys had a fucking normal, simple things. We need wireless mics. We need introductions and ten minutes of silence before we go. So we can get dead air time. I walked out of the bathroom. And Jose is going. There's really no need for all. This podcasting is better.
It's better you've
overcomplicated, you have
Yeah, we have what everybody wanted to be on The Tonight Show. So you made your own Tonight
Show. Look at this for you. Yeah. Fucking stage lighting and shit Larry, but you kind of did this. That's the thing. But I didn't see this doing that to you. Don't think it's a bad idea anymore. Exactly. This is your fault.
We have a little bit of a debate that needs to be settled. Oh because the
The last time we all hung out Mark was with us after the fight, you remember, we went to the fight in Phoenix and Phoenix and and we sat down at a great steak restaurant. Are they give a shit for this first off and angelfish or something?
No. No,
okay. We're sitting down you get the tomahawk. Yes, okay.
Everybody else looks at the menu and they look at the most expensive thing and they go, I'll just do one below that out of respect for Joe. Who's going to pay for this dinner, as you always do. Oh, I see. What are you
doing? Sitting like this? It goes, It goes
Joe. And then Mark. And then Joe goes all the tomahawk
and the more. It doesn't even wait for the waiter to come over. He goes double it up. It's a good movie. Okay. I don't see where there's a problem. Thank you.
It's old. It's an expensive steak.
Oh, you don't think Joe can do that. You don't think? Joe's got it. We're
having fun. Yeah. Yeah, you cannot think like
that and you been hanging out me too long.
Yeah. Yeah, you sounded super nasally right there. You should never think like that. Okay, it's just a restaurants not you're not buying
Ferraris. Yeah,
but we can't stake. Sweet batshit going to bind Stakes for people because I
Fuck. He's missed a drink. Have fun order wine.
Have a good time. Now. Mark was a little
disappointed that you didn't finish your steak. Okay? All right. I didn't say like
that. Now, you did a couple of pieces of meat you did. Bring it up. You're like man, you know, I could do two of these
easy and I was like, all right. Well if you're going for it, I'm going to go for it. And then
Did not say I could do Tony you, fucking people of the weirdest, things, you focus on state cost on the first thing is what I'm talking about.
Gah, a month ago is, right? You can you change this into like a regular studio? Abandon All the Rules of podcast. That's right. We have rules a podcast. No rules. There's
no rule. Yeah. That's yeah, that's great
Studio.
We ordered all kinds of food that didn't get eaten. There was desserts and all kinds of shit around that table and lobsters and now I'd be pissed.
If I paid for somebody's feeling, they didn't need it. What do you got to lift? Our go
bitch? Things to be pissed at the world nuclear war famine disease,
but they can't because you kill it. You have to eat it, you know, within a certain amount of time, or it's not good anymore. Let it go. We appreciate you so much for coming. Joe. My husband. Now you're in town for a day. Yeah. I'm just in town for you, man. Oh, what's to be going to Atlantic City? I'm going to Lenny. I brought cigars for everybody. I'm going to Atlanta.
City tomorrow doing Atlantic City with Hinchcliffe and Hans Kim and Joey Diaz. We're doing this new Arena that they got down there. Yeah, so
that's Friday and Saturday. So I'm here on Thursday, just for you Mike. You're the fucking with you, man. And
did you have to move the Lex combo? Was he cool with that? Yes. Yeah, he's fine. He's alleged. Thank you very much likes for doing that. I forgive you for being absolutely shit-faced of my
wedding, as a plus one. He was shit-faced at your wedding, but he was way more shit face in
the
L've hours of hung out with them. After the know
send me a video of him just knocked out to. It's like a homeless guy. Wasn't
it was brutal and then some weird gig that you guys were at. Yes, like Whitney's, corporate gig. Yeah, I can't believe. Do you even went on?
I'm good. Thank you. You got the same things and just be upset about food.
It was sit around playing about shit. That means nothing. He's not. Come on. Oh, that's right, Indian. Yeah, Indian. Yeah, that's a drag dude. That's bullshit.
I had steak before I've eaten it. Oh, I don't miss it.
No, I don't miss it. I stopped eating it
when I was like 12 and then I just never found myself. I would have like, hamburgers and stuff on accident and then my brother told me Veals dear like an asshole and I just I ate it. I was like, this is not good. What is this? Mad fatty? I'm not into it.
Wow. Is there any animal? You won't kill?
Eat a dog, why not? Because they're cute. I like them. They're fun, yanis. Pappas had this like crazy explanation. Why we have this connection to dogs. They helped us develop our frontal cortex or something because they protected Us in the night. So we have to stay up. So predators didn't devour us. There's an argument for that. I mean, we definitely turn them into dogs. It was basically the bitch-ass wolves. Hmm, the bitch house wolves that didn't want to hunt and you know, kind of like coward and you know submitted themselves.
Close to us and we'd throw them food and then they would bark when other things come near. Its that's what happened. That was the process. A Chihuahua is a fucking wolf. Hmm, which is wild. Yeah, it's like that. It started out as a wolf but through selective breeding. They figured out a way to turn them into chihuahuas.
And why can they breed like with close family members? Whether you agree with dogs, you know, I mean, no, but you complete the same family of do the same way people can you can fuck your sister and make a kid, but that becomes retarded, right? Yeah, but it doesn't, you know, becomes
Chihuahua. It's not that it doesn't definitely become retarded. It
becomes retarded when there's a lot of inbreeding, right? But people been in breeding forever. I mean, look at the English family. The English royal families. Yeah. You ever see those paintings of those old dudes, like, from back in the day on the wall.
Now, you know, all my God, they look horrendous. They all. They all have like, distorted faces and, yeah, because of inbreeding because they would only have sex with other Royals. They don't like his promise and shit. And like their bodies were fucked up, but it didn't affect her intellect. Anyway, oh, definitely did. Yeah, probably did. Yeah. I'm sure how could they run countries? Because they were monarchy there in charge already just like Joe Biden.
You think about it? How could intellect, how can you put in the country? The game fucking count? No idea. What's going on. He
says, banging out numbers.
So that's a perfect example of like if you just get into a position where you're already in power, people will protect you. They want to keep their jobs. They want to keep that form of power because they're saying these dependent on your power. So they just keep you there kind of as a puppet. Yeah, and then the manipulate, that was my theory about George Bush jr. Yeah, they just they had him there and they're like, let's just he'll let us run the country the way we want it. Well, look who he had first fucking vice president. The CEO of Halliburton. Yeah.
They did the most transparent shit of all time. They gave Halliburton billions and billions of dollars in no-bid contracts
do bid. So no one is no one's competing. No one's going. I could do it
for Less, right? And they did it for shit that they blew up. So they would blow things up and then they would hire Halliburton
to rebuild it and he had stock in Holabird. So he was
profiting off of the United States rebuilding shit that they blew up because of his decision. Have you met with people that are in these?
Positions of power. Now, no, never heard of avoided it, but they've tried to meet up. I've had some opportunities to meet some people that I don't want to meet ya. And no, thanks. How do you say no? Thanks to the people that do whatever they want. You just don't respond, you ghost them
ghost, the CIA.
I think by this point in time, they probably don't want to have anything to do with me. But I think in before, like a lot of the controversy in the Spotify stuff, they were looking at the podcast as a way for people to get on there and have a chance to shape the narrative. Hmm. You know what? I'm a friendly guy. I'm a nice guy. I'm not trying to play gotcha with anybody yet. So people come on, if they say they don't want to talk about something. I said, they'll problem. Nope. Yeah. I'm just interested in a conversation. And so I think
I think they would look at it as like a unique way to manipulate public information or Public's concept something. So they're doing that with you, the definitely doing it on Facebook. They're doing it on the news to happen. There's no no question about it. They're doing it with everything, everybody's compromised. Well, there's the problem is the people that are actually doing. It are also aware of it and upset by it because it also affects them. So you got people like Edward Snowden who get to a certain point in time. He was like, what the fuck are we doing? And then
Goes public with this, right? And now he has to ironically live in Russia. Yeah, hide right from the United States, but that was he's that kind of guy because he's an internet guy. When did you know your you were big enough that people could use your platform to manipulate the masses. Was there? A moment where you're like, somebody hit me up in your like. Oh fuck, I'm big enough that I need to start being watchful or weary. I said, just take. Those are like a slow burn, you know over time. I figured it out. Yeah, well was
Like right in the beginning, the early days I have anybody on Holocaust isn't
real. Come on, cries out that people on that. I only agree with this is gonna get boring. Yeah.
Is that a thing you seek
out? Like, I want people. I know I'm going to disagree with at least early on, you'd be like, well, that's the only way to know the only criteria is. Am I interested in talking to them? So I get like, hundreds of requests, right? They all come into the email and I looked on the ground. Hm. Where does it go? Walked across Antarctica?
Yeah, like the one I saw those. I've had a couple of those. I got another another guy
coming on soon. That's done. Some wild shit like that. Like those like it's just gotta be.
Interesting to me. Yeah, like I had Kristen back on this week. Okay. She was a male Navy SEAL and then became transgender. And then they have this one, the doctor hero and Levi, lady Valor know the one where he was threatening. Yeah. She was threat grabbed a girl's neck. No spear goes. That's not very ladylike.
That's a pretty good line. Now, he's hilarious.
Ben Spiros, a funny, dude. This is Kristen back up there. So was a Navy SEAL and
then decided to transition and become a woman and okay, but just super honest and open and you know, it's so odd because used to be this bad ass dude, with a beard and now she's got fake boobs and butt. Looks like a man. Yeah, like dresses, like a man. Like well, I don't think it's like really trying hard, right? To look like a woman. Just looking like herself. Did she talk about that? Yeah. Is she being? She doesn't try to hide her voice or anything? She's not. Like what's that? The chick from Theron else?
She's my favorite.
Yeah, that's when Jesus spoke to her already. Yeah, I had her on the podcast this week. She grew up in a small town in Texas and always felt wrong. Always. Felt like she was in the wrong body. Yeah. I always felt fucked up. Got no, there was no manipulation. No, no one was grooming her. There was no, it was 100% just how she felt. Yeah, and it's interesting too, because
You got to realize men. Yes, everybody is different. You know, there's a spectrum. This motherfucker doesn't even eat me basically try
it. Yeah, basically, yeah, so we had, we had
Derek posen's favorite porn star Daisy Taylor, right? And that was the first time I had like extended conversation with a trans woman and by the end of the podcast, and I mean by the end I was like no. No. This this girl is a girl. Yeah, we had her boyfriend on.
Who said that? He had done Geisha before, and he's like, but when I'm with her, it doesn't feel gay. Now, if you've done the gay shit, you know,
yeah, no one knows better than to disagree. No, nothing
to do. Whatever the fuck they want. That's why you need to have someone else. What is that? Okay, windshield see smokes. Have you ever been
Rangers?
Do
you have to take the reins after he doesn't?
Last time we smoke, where than coover? And then he went out. Took out. Where's the ice? Yeah. Boy. Let's go. Come on. Remember you just took the lead on a great.
You got one. Who's only, why
don't you drink a good drinks around?
We got single malt whiskey right there. We got Kela in front of you. Okay, where's the whiskey? Yeah. Yeah, I do.
Now, we won't throw me an ice cube is podcast in the new studio sober. Thank you. That's when sobs Jones coming on.
When he doesn't go to jail. I don't
think that's an option. I think the jail is a possibility. Really? It's just money. Yeah, it's mostly money went really good.
Here we go. So it's done after this. I just want to let you know go. No, I just want to let you know, that's fine. You're already high. Look his eyes. It will hit and you'll just know and it is what it is. I like a pressure. This is awesome. Yeah, I've never smoked weed. How will this do it? Are you gonna be perfect. Yeah, you were amazing for you. You don't have to drive right now.
Well, hi.
I feel like I'm in French admit. It's just, it's fine. Everything's pressure, agreed. It would be with you. I'm 100%, pressuring you. Okay, take some responsibility. How do I? Alright, take a big
hit. You're gonna see. Krishna so you probably have asthma because you don't eat me. That's
not a hit. That wasn't a hell. Yeah. That was some real pussy. I should, I
know, he's eating beef
tonight. He's gonna kick it.
Maybe.
Oh, that's a good one, right there,
whatever. Bro. Who
cares people to care about? What people eat people smoking, gotta be bested. The rules are different here in New York. Okay, Joe. Before I get too high. We have a we have a weightlifting question for you. Okay.
Owl is incredibly Diesel with his arms actually, has to not lift weights or else they get bigger. He'll get there he is. It actually not lift weights. Wow, but his legs.
Will not grow on ya. What will not grow at all. What do you do to try to make them grow
squats? Deadlifts really,
don't throw it. All consistently works out and the arms doesn't touch. Yeah. Well, look at Jon Jones and John Jones. The
Greatest girl, Nothing. Jon Jones is one. I was not like that at all. Was it was like
an amazing guide, his girl and everything.
What
about his athleticism? John has tiny calves? Yeah, they're tiny. They're like almost non-existent. It's the craziest thing and he works out fucking
hard. Nobody works harder than Jon Jones.
Just power. Lifted dead lifts and squats, right? Yes. Times are still tiny. Hmm, like tiny calves, like, it makes no sense. Look a little. His calves are. Yeah, but you can see there. They're so small. And he's got like, literally the perfect frame for fighting because you only has muscle where needs it.
Got shoulders is got arms and
he's got the cat's got
sighs. He doesn't need his caps. He's so long. It's like he's designed in a lab. Like, if you wanted to design a perfect, like, physique for fighting. I think it's John Jones, and he's a master at distance. He's the best at using this gift that he has, which is being very tall for the way class is incredible. Like, for keeping a guy away from you. Think of he fought in Ghana he'd win.
You never know. You know, I mean John Jones is a tough guy to bet against but he's never really fought a heavyweight. He's trained with heavy weights for
sure, you know, one that didn't count mitigated
to and Ghana has the nuclear option on any person that lives. Hmm, any person that lives if in gone, right? If he catches you with one of those ones that he hit Rosen strike with or that he knocked out steep a with or or the Alistair Overeem left hook. Oh, yeah. That Alistair. Overeem was one of the most disturbing punches. I've ever seen a guy get
With, because he was off before, like he went to the ground. He got shut off immediately and his head went almost all the way back. Hmm, like
right land and came back and then he hit him with a hammer fist time
in his head went back while he was standing up. Pull that video up, watch this.
Jesus Christ, fuck me, bro. Yeah, that guy. He did that too. That's Alistair Overeem. Yeah,
like that's a big guy like Alistair. Overeem is the former K 1 Grand Prix Champion, Alistair Overeem was the Strikeforce Heavyweight Champion Alistair. Overeem is a fucking
Savage. He's
really good. So for Francis to do that to Alistair Overeem, I mean Alistair. Overeem is one of the most dedicated Strikers. Fuck one. See how good Alistair Overeem is. Pull up Alistair.
In versus Brock Lesnar San Marcos,
this was back when
they were doing a smell test back then for steroids. That's all they did.
There's anybody past, it's so
ridiculous. When you look at Brock Lesnar and he's standing right next to
like look at, look at the two of them. How the fuck did he pass anything? They used to call him ubering back
then, like he wasn't like a real person. Yeah. He was like a comic book.
Here. Oh, yeah,
his physique was
perfect and his kick boxing skills world-class. Dude. I mean k, 1 Grand Prix Champion. When they didn't test, or when they tested very lightly Alistair, was running the show.
Yeah, I would have loved to see what happened. If they just like this testing. We do any of the other
organizations, not test the bear.
They're not testing,
right? I don't know how they test. They test depending upon the commission, like, some commissions are very strict. Like, you can't pull any funny business in Nevada. Nevada is got it down, pat. They're the best athletic commission. They do the most big-time fights. They have everything, smooth and Polished. Yeah, but some commissions are wild. Yeah. Looks like Michael Bisping got past with multiple times with one eye. Yeah. Could they be doing a good
job? Who the fuck? Let him do that? I mean,
In
all respect and props to Michael Bisping. Because young people talking about toughness, you toughness like to what extent? What about a guy who loses an eye and then doesn't tell anybody because he wants to keep fighting and wins 10 fights. Plus the world title with one fucking eye. Yeah, that's crazy. I don't want to tell a guy you can't do that. Yeah, and I'm saying is like, I don't want you to do that. Yeah, but I don't want to tell a guy, you can't do that. Hey, why is it? Why is it that when guys get knocked out, they get chinni.
Well, Chuck Liddell told me that it's because your brain is trying to protect you because it knows you're too tough and you're going to take more shots and it knows those shots are damaging you it. So instead of letting you just be tough and take it your brain after you've been shut off a few times. Just lets you go out quicker and do they know the amount of times. I don't no one knows because it did it, varies some people it's they you can also catch someone at a point in their career where they've been concussed and then maybe they've been cussed at the
Them and then they get knocked out one or two times a year and it's a real problem, but then they take time off and they come back and they're good. So it's like is it that they're getting damaged a lot in training to maybe there's lost a step. Are they coming into a fight damage? Yeah, because sometimes guys come into fights like shop, talked about that back when he was training with all those guys in Colorado. Like they would have some crazy-ass Wars and guys would get back.
Banged up really bad in the gym and then they would fight and they would already be
kind of, that's the football thing. Yeah.
It's like those guys are getting concussed and practice and I put them back out there job used to spar with Shane Carwin. Yeah, Shane. Carwin is fists are two of my fist. Yeah, not exaggerating. He was a Preposterous man and Shabbos of Spar that dude. Shane. Carwin was probably the single biggest one punch other than in Ghana Striker ever in the UFC. Shane Carwin knocks a lot of. Look at that was Shane. Carl has a big dude. He
House. So big. He was the interim champion and
he almost got Brock Lesnar. He had him fucked up in the first round and he was on top of them and beating the shit out of him, but he
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All right, guys, let's get back to the
show. You think did the UFC will start to get? I'm good, bro look like candy.
He said let's get paranoid. Let's do it. That was you text me back. I'll bring him weed and cigars. Let's get paranoid. I'm My Own the fuck paranoid, but I call the cops on himself right now. Looking up conspiracy shit, Ru Ru. There's a bus fun. When your spirit these now,
right? There's some conspiracy is I'm sure. Okay. Conspiracy is a lot of them are just made up.
Shit, so I'm sure I'm in a few. Yeah, have you heard any about yourself? No, no, try not to listen to anything about
me. It's just too dangerous. My feelings hurt. Do you still get hurt by?
Not mean you what? I guess. You're human. Yeah, people say mean. Shouldn't you read it? You're like, oh, wow. Is that really me? Yeah. No. Just like it's this, you know, Louis c.k. Said something interesting. He goes, it's just talk, right? Like people always just talk but it's written down. So it seems like it's something more because people,
Read it
like oh because but people have always been doing that. It's just talk but it's now everybody could read what people decide to talk about. You're just saying that because it's recorded well because it's recorded and because of how you're doing it. Yeah, you know like you just heard is if it's just mad voices out there. Talking it's whatever gets lost in the noise, but if it's written, any read it, then it feels more official. It feels more weighty that what you're saying. Yeah. Yeah. I think there's something about it being written down. So
this is just feels more real
thing. Yeah, you know.
No, there's a yeah, Amber Heard started only fans to do see that.
Did you really know? He started conspiracy? Right?
What do you think about the verdict? Well, I think it was probably good for all people who believe in the truth and they're the problem is is like this boys vs. Girls narrative that. I think we all get into on these things, you know, and there's a lot of guys who
I wanted a guy to win one of these things. Yeah, you know. Yeah, but it's just not good to not be honest. And if you are doing that and you're doing it to try to hurt someone, yeah, I'll give your purposely changing reality. You're lying about what happened just to try to hurt somebody, right? You're you're doing a fucked-up thing because you're pretending you're a victim and it's so, it's not as simple as you're just lying. You, you're turning someone into a criminal.
Well, you're pretending you're a victim and it's if it's all not true. If it's all not true. It's a really bad thing. Yeah, it's really bad. It's just bad for all of us. Yeah, so, whether it's bad for with like someone said that the verdict is bad for women and like, that's gonna say that, that's crazy. It's, it's just not good to do shit like that. Do you think it's all know? Some guy beat you up? I don't know. I could I, you know, you watch the trial and
You form your own opinions unless you're there unless there's direct evidence. And other than the evidence of like the conversations, they had that they were both recording which is
vile. Did they secretly each other? And what your wife says twice?
Now, I think they'll die. Think they both knew. So they both knew so they decided to have like a performance.
Ian, you're recording in knowing someone else is gonna list it be. So that's
not a real conversation. Like you're putting on a show. Yes. Yeah. It's a real. It's like yes. Keeping Up with the Kardashians knows the camera there.
Yeah, they know the cameras are there. Yeah, don't get put on a
show unique Kris Jenner on. I don't
need this. Yes.
Why do you need that? I would lose all so. Fascinating. There's a boundary to demon before.
Oh my God.
These. Yeah, bro. Why? Because I found creditor from devil but isn't she just crafty? Yes. She's like the most with whatever resources she had and one more daughter pulled out. That's the crazy thing is is I'm trying to look at things with rose-colored glasses,
Austin shit. Just so much defensiveness in this.
World right now and is so much like what we think of as like things that are completely out of our hands like when you think of things like the war with the possible war with Ukraine, that's completely out of our hands. We're all just sitting here in a state of anxiety. Right? Like what are we going to do if Russia launches a nuke? If some wild shit happens? If China invades Taiwan, what are we going to do? So we're in this like Perpetual state?
Of never feeling. Like I'm just living life because I'm living life under this canopy of danger and doom. But if it's not that's climate change. Yeah, it's not if it's not that it's the new variants. There's going to be new variants coming in January. Get ready.
Yeah. It's like this constant, but the which is we got to be
aware of things. But the problem with danger is when it gets in the Zeitgeist like that. Yeah,
it's takes a long time to clean that out. Yeah. When I
was a kid.
The Cold War days were happening. And we were legitimately worried that, at any day, Russia could nuke the United States. It came super
close, right? Super close. Well, the definitely did during the Cuban Missile
Crisis. Exactly. Yeah, that was that was a little bit before my time. But
that was but not much. I'm
old as fuck, but they, they were worried all the time. Man. They had stop drop and roll or would it would just stop
go wrong with your cover something like that.
Night under desk
doesn't stop. Drop and roll. That's if your arms. That's fire. Yeah,
that's like stop drop covers. I'm sure
something like that but we were when we were in high school man, it was a religious fear. Like when that Red Dawn movie came out. Yeah, like those are legit fear that we were going to go to a nuclear war with Russia and we would all get wiped out and everybody had this kind of anxiety about it. It's like stuck with you and then when the Soviet Union fell, that all went away and for a brief moment of time, it felt relaxed. It really did. Yeah, it felt like, we don't have to worry about.
Nuclear war. We just have to worry about fucked-up Wars. We just had to wear these hot Wars. They're shooting tanks and each other in the desert. Yeah. Yeah. Long as we have to world,
you know, so we like accepted a
certain level of war and now the nuclear war part is back on the table. And I think that's one of the things that it flavors, all of our conversations, whether we realize it or not because we're all under this like steady state of anxiety. Yes, and then climate change what? And it's not saying don't do things about climate change. We took should
Yeah, all this. How dare you all that. Why is that advantageous to keep us in a steady state of anxiety? It's not that it's advantageous. It's human nature to like seek that it's human nature to try to find the danger. The promise. You're not supposed to know about danger with 7 billion people. Yes, too many fucking people. He's supposed to know about danger in your community. Yeah, like, you're supposed to have a small tribe of 150 or so people and you know about everything you can eat.
And you know, about all the people that are dangerous. Yeah, it's 70 people. They
can't Dunbar number. They would, I think it's 1011 50th, but
it's actually teared. I didn't know it was teared. It's the dunbar's. Number is you get a certain amount of like intimate close friends that, you know, well. And then from there on it's like yet 50 people who, you know their name. You don't know too much about them. And then there's like a Peter people 1500 people. You can recognize 500 acquaintances, 150, meaningful contacts, 50 friends, 15 good
And yeah, interesting. I would look at all of that by
someone's gotta get cut. Loved ones. What if you
do, a lot of cool people. We do a lot of cool people. Yeah.
It's got to get cut off from my top 15. Everybody's like bro woman on your top nine. All right, man. So silly is your Myspace list. Just, that's your Dunbar number, bro,
dude.
That's the thing. It's like I think we really are only designed to interact with a certain amount of people. I think that's why interaction on social media is so hostile. Mmm. It's so it's not normal. You're not supposed to be interacting with that many people. So you got a tattoo coming out. It's like, but it's like yeah, too much and I can't care about you. I just have too many people. It's too much 1,500. Yeah, I don't give a fuck. What do our brains adapt over time. You think I think they do? I think our brains are going to evolve and they're going to eventually
Whether it's through electronic Intervention, which is the most likely scenario that they put something in our brains and it allows us to interface with each other in a different way and along the way Ilana described it. He said you going to be able to talk without words as narrowly. Yeah. This is his version of it, but I'm sure there's multiple versions. You think you'll see that in our lifetime. Yes. Yes. I think we see that way quicker than we think, I think how cell phones took over when
Cell phones went from being like who has its. Look at Michael Douglas on the
beach. That fucking greed is good. Bitch, ass holes. That no one talks about that. Yeah. Well, no one talks about that part of the beach. Be making phone calls. No cord out here. Doesn't give a fuck. Yeah, you think.
Greatest shape in World politics. Yeah, you can't finish the movie. You've cut it off right before the angel. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what's good. It's like Scarface. I'm sad when he dies Tony Montana to live. Yeah. I did. What I said. Never split up again. Let's go. Let's go.
I like that. You went leather. I
always wear this. Once my nice one.
Yeah, I gotta sleep one. You got the workout one. No. No, but that's the what I usually use. Yeah,
and her has one of those but he wears around his shoulder, which I think is way gay. Oh, yeah, that's
well. It's just a cop-out. Yeah. Thank you. You just afraid.
It's like a kilt. It is what it looks like. Man, does not give a fuck. Look at this. This is what it's supposed to look like this. What you've been
working for. This is better. It's better. I can keep stuff in there. It's better. Yeah, it's just better know. Yeah. What about Pockets?
Yeah, but in your legs,
With the bad. Yeah, they found out. She was a princess because they put a p like
13-under just couldn't sleep. I didn't imagine like she's a princess because
her body is so
weak. You put a pea under her. It's all over. She can't see.
What? That's how you can tell she's a princess. Everybody can't even sleep with the Pea under there. Yeah. She's so delicate delicate than a PE fucked her up.
Yeah, that's supposed to be amazing. Hmm. Like, what are you talking about?
That's like the more fat and pale you were back in the day,
like, the more High Society, you are,
if you can afford a gluttony in the face of
abject poverty, all around, you people literally starving to death and you're a slob, you're sleeping on
food. He's
just
filled gut with
wine. That was that was the first Gordon Gekko. That was it. That was greed is good. Everybody's everybody's like we could just get a few crumbs. No ghost. You've gotten high in front of the whole world is Tai
Chi, bro, you just
Okay, you got it. He knows what the
fuck up. I've never seen you. How are you not high? I don't know. Because he faked it. I did you not get, you didn't accept it as might affect. It was an acceptable pufta job to take it on the honor
System. Depends on how much went in some came outside. I don't know what was in there.
It was one of these.
Did you guys get fucked up at all? From the we labelmark? Love
it? I feel a tad slow but
not like this. He's people look at it, the wrong way. What is what is this? It just
removes a layer of
protection. I feel that we knew you and the known universe. I don't feel like that.
I feel more like I would like the layer back
you'll get
I enjoyed that protection that I, he'll get it back. You're gonna get, you're gonna get the layer of top. Fires are going to waste this account right though. It's very nice. It's a nice couch, looks good. Just
doesn't make you more comfortable. Look at office chair where I don't make me rethink my
situation. He likes. Why, see what I'm saying? Wireless mics, you get to move around and act out. It's definitely, but then you'd better for talking shit.
Well, that does definitely better for talking shit. That's
simply just here to talk shit, but I wonder if Chris
couch would be
Be the way you'd want to interview a
scientist. No, but I just got tits. I mean, who's now a woman? A female woman with huge tits? Yes. That's how I would like to interview them. Well, I bet you probably do your show. Say again.
I'm not going back to would probably do your shoe. You get me, the North Korean.
Oh my God. She has a name. Oh my gosh. Don't make me pronounce the name of the North Korean. I think there's enough.
Kim. Oh you sound like a yam. I'm like no. Is there a do you think
that she would ever come on
reach
out? You own me. You hold me part. Yummy Park stunning stories. Crazy. Yeah,
what else her story is so crazy. She got some crazy ones. Don't you do it?
We send each other meme, so sent me pictures of a dude squatting and I know exactly. He's talking about the super heavy bro. Not she got something bro. She's already of our interaction on text messages for a solid four or five days after just texting me. The heavy yomi Park out to dinner. Me, too.
Listen, you boys getting a little Saucy and it is what it is. You
know, Crashers a
guard. What? Let me get my foreskin. Hey, man, that's a good cigar, what you think about circumcising women take responsibility, for whatever happens.
It's clearly my fault and you get them high crazy right now.
My friend. I'm really happy for you. And I want to tell you one thing that I love about what you do is you find your own ways through things, you know, you find your own ways through things. And I was talking about you the other day in The Green Room at the Vulcan, Austin.
That think about it. Like you can't even say turn your phone
sideways. That's Schultz of shit. Turn your foot. You can't say that
anymore. I agree. No one else can say that. You can't you figured out how to own turn your phone
sideways. I stole it. We did it, we did it, but that's that's a weird.
And then you figured out how to do that. And make these cinematic comedic pieces, while the world was falling apart. No one's doing anything. Yeah, you put your shit on.
All out on YouTube blows up
you. And then you put together. This place is cool as fuck. We did, we did all these guys. I
know, I know there's other people involved. Just trying to tell you what, thank you. What? What you're doing. What you're doing is awesome. Well, you're doing gives me hope because you're doing exactly what with the cameras are off. What you do in the cameras, are on the way we talk shit. When the cameras are off, is the way we talk shit, when the cameras are on your a real dude, and it's so important for people,
Like that in Akash. I really wish you would go back to eating meat.
Thanks. You're awesome to both you guys.
And you know, the fact that you've carved your own show. You got your own vibe to your show. You know, it's like your show is a fun silly hang, you know, but you could talk about serious shit too, but you can flow back and forth between serious shit and completely Preposterous conversation. Only weighs fun.
It's so fun. We're so lucky that we get to do this and who are some of them scientist you were talking to had a fucking joke in there, but
sometimes, but
sometimes I want to talk to them to, you know, I mean, even if they're dry, like, I want to extract like what you need a person who thinks like that. Yeah. That's what's fascinating to me, because I'm so dumb. This is the biggest cat in the world. Do you telling people? You're dumb is bullshit? No. No, I'm dumb compared to young people. Complain. No, no, listen to me.
Listen, they're good at. Well, you know how to play pool?
Yes, okay, me too. I wanted to but I some players ever.
Let me tell you something. I know I don't play pool, but I suck. I don't suck compared to you. I'll fuck you
up. Let's go pay the regular
people, right, or rather compared to professional. Yes, there's levels. Yeah, and I am fucking dumb. When I talk to Elon Musk. I'm very aware. How dumb I am really? Yes. Well, I talked to Lex Friedman when I talk to, but
if you text you on about emotions and human
interaction, if you talk to Ilan about emotions in human or action.
I'm probably you're much smarter than him. He's not dumb in that regard. He's a different kind of human man. Like that's an unusual combination of characteristics. He likes to make jokes. He takes a picture of Bill Gates and then he puts it next to a pregnant man emoji. And it says,
here's a quick way to lose your boner. Yeah, if you want to lose your boner really quick. That's what he said. He pops that yeah. Teapot is the richest man in the world and he's dunking on other billionaire. I love that. No, God celebrate that love Eli. He
loves.
That nature of the internet. And the thing that bothers him, is this idea that like one gatekeeper can dictate whether or not something gets released into the whole world. If you're using something like Twitter, like you can have an amazing story and they can block it if ideologically they disagree with it. Like, that's what happened with that hundred Biden laptop. Yeah, what happened with that? Well, they decided to say that it was Russian disinformation, and
That you couldn't share the links on Twitter or Facebook. Twitter said that. Yeah, Twitter would not let you share the links and the link is from a story in the New York Post, which is really kind of crazy because that's like one of the oldest newspapers in America Hamilton. It's a long-established newspaper and they wouldn't let you post. It's not like sambal wild-ass website, right? You know some weird body on being a real website if it's it was fucking New York Post. And so when
Something like a Twitter has the ability. Just tell you what you can and can't talk about. Yeah, even if that thing is valid, even if that thing, what if it does legitimately, I don't know what the fuck is in his laptop, but what if it does legitimately point to corruption? We supposed to just ignore it because we want to own the people on the right is like, that's what we do with policy. Right? What you mean. She met corrupt. She's definitely corrupt, but she's corrupting a loophole where I think talk to me. She's doing a thing where her husband by
I stock in companies and she may or may not know things that would have happened. That would affect the way that company is and they hipster. So rich, they did a thing on her husband where they showed, like how successful he is and the stock market like compared to regular people, right? Yeah. He totally there's no way that he knows things.
She makes like 200 grand and I'm not saying that he knows he's not saying that he's just a genius. Great investor is better than Buffett. That's
One of her, Susie goes down, wizard
puts a wizard's hat on and he finds the right things to gamble on. Yeah, and he always wins. I mean she's worth like hundreds of millions of dollars good for her. She come from under again. I don't think so. I think she died respect that though because most these motherfuckers come from money. They keep changing the rules of the game to help themselves. At least. If you were in the gutter before and then you shift the rules up as like, well, he's he made the climb. A lot of these motherfuckers are just born in it. You're saying that she hustled for. Yeah, we should got there on her own.
Hey, what is it about people that were born in it? Right? Like Prince's? Why does so many of them become like Psychopaths? I don't think he throughout history. Wait a minute. What do you mean first generation becomes? Like a lot of like, like Saddam Hussein's Sons? Yeah. We're some of the most evil people that have ever lived. They would do horrific shit. There's stories of them kidnapping women on their wedding day, like going to them, taking them from their husband. Yeah, right.
Being them and feeding them to their dogs. What that's her. Yes, like for real. Yeah, he's finished. Yes. That's all that's left them to their dogs. Yeah. I think there's a sociopathy that develops or sociopathy. Every say it when you're so removed from any normal human interaction that it you're not. You don't like ever develop him. You don't get to feel bad for people because no one shows you the bad shit. So there's no remorse to feel. I think so, you're just like, well, it's just push this as far as they can push it. I this is a theory. I just came up with
I dare you to debunk it. I think they get stuck in this idea. Like we have a human beings have this thing where we other each other, you know, like if you're going to go to war with that group, even it's like North versus South. Yeah. Let me represent. Can we can other eat? Yeah, and I think we could do that with anything. Yeah. I didn't know that happen with the kids. I thought the kids and I cursed him week know, I heard they were awful. But in recent times kids, I'm just saying in general. I thought like
the, the kids of successful people.
It's sometimes, but there's
There's a few of those instances of evil Kings, right? That's like Game of Thrones. Remember, Joffrey coffee using evil King. Like there's a long history. Okay. Of young men who take over the throne from their father and their just fucking evil. Yeah. Well, maybe they don't have the empathy because they didn't have to earn it. Like if you come from nothing, you have empathy for all the other people who have nothing and those kids who come from everything. Why would they even feel bad? Also, the reality, the just the reality of violence was accelerated back then because people are doing sword, fight it. Yeah.
They're hitting each other with bows and arrows and hacking each other to death. And so, it was happening. And probably like everybody saw it, right? Like the amount of laws and rules that they had back when that shit was going on. Yeah, you see death all the time. Like I think about that. Now, I've seen a dead body like three times my life you so if you yeah, I mean, like my grandfather passed away open casket, but like, back in the day, they all saw Bobby. Yeah, like you're confronted by life and death book ended all the time. You know what they talked about? Like, people the
Expectancy, the average life is because he used to be like 30 years old. You know, what a lot of that is. It's the babies would die
infant death.
It was a big part of it, a big part of it was they used to have all these fertility rituals back then they would do fertility rituals to try. Like it was like important to make more people and they would be worried that they would run out of people known while. So the fertility rituals are like the community coming around to make sure that you have a baby. Well, there's just so many infant death. They're like, yo, let's have it.
Having many kids as possible because so many die. We might run out. I could have been like that. They did, they had dances or myths or stuff like that. But like, that was there was a guy named John Marco, Allegro, who wrote a book. This is the cows, sacred Mushroom in the cross.
I was literally told them today. I saw this thing yesterday with you. Okay, going this weird on Unity. Is there mushroom
gianmarco? Allegro, he spent like, just I think it was somewhere in the neighborhood of 14 years. Deciphering, the Dead Sea Scrolls, and he wasn't
Deigned Minister who one of the Dead Sea Scrolls, the Dead Sea Scrolls, the oldest version of the Bible. I think that they've ever found in Aramaic. I might be wrong about that, but it's a old version of the Bible that was written on animal skins and left in clay pots at qumran. So they found these fairly recently. Like I think they found him in the 20th century or the 19th. Yeah. 4647. Okay, so was 20th century and so then they started decipher gum. And this one guy, he was an ordained minister, but
Then as he became a scholar of ancient religions, he became agnostic and but he was still on the Dead Sea Scrolls committee. So, this guy is an expert in languages. They're trying to decipher this language and so his conclusion at the end of 14 years is that the entire Cult of Christianity was really all about the consumption of psychedelic mushrooms and fertility rituals. Hmm. And that the whole thing was a way to hide this knowledge.
In Parables and stories and that it was just passed down and translated over and over and over getting lost, like a lot of its meaning along the way when people stop participating in the rituals, but his belief was and he was an expert in the origins of words and he traced back the word Christ to an ancient Sumerian word, that meant a mushroom covered in God's Seaman. Because they thought when it rained that it was God coming on the earth because
That that was how things would grow back.
So what they? So when like you have no science, there's we do nothing scientific liquid. And then all of a sudden things grow that is life springing from the earth. So
must be God coming on your fertile, right? So here's where it gets more. Complicated mushrooms grow like that. Okay, so you could have no mushrooms and you get out of your tent and then there's mushrooms. Yeah, like literally overnight, they're going mushrooms, so they would eat these mushrooms.
Trip balls. Yeah, and mushrooms in low doses. Increase visual Acuity. They make people hornier. They establish a more potent Bond of community. It allows creativity that is linked to the development of language can read me for one second. We have mushrooms here. If you
want, do we really? Yeah. I'm not doing a foamy scared. Let's fucking go the Dead.
Sea Scrolls, mostly in Hebrew. Little bit of a
romantic.
It's a break for a second because I got to tell you all that seek, man. I mean, if you didn't know, already speak is a ticketing app. That makes
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The link in the description to download the app. Now, let's get back to the show The Dead Sea Scrolls. The way they found out what pieces were they had to do? DNA tests. Yeah, they had to find out which cow the pieces came from and then they put all the pieces where the count came from and then they had to try to piece it together. It's wild shed, and that's insane. And I've never read the Dead Sea Scrolls, but the people that read it so it's really fast if that's what it meant. Would you be a
Christian? Come on? Now, I'm joining any
groups, man.
What do you think? That's what is meant. I think that's a real problem
with people. What do you mean groups? Talk to me? Yeah, you joined the Christians and also on the Baptist's, our enemies, you don't like process anymore. Yeah, you know, like that's what happened with the Catholics, and the Protestants in Ireland. I mean, there's obviously a lot more to it. But, you know, it was literally religion versus religion, killing each other. When one group finds itself, they tolerate each other, and then they don't tolerate anyone else. It's the other hand over to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's that's the history of humans. As crazy. Do you subscribe?
Grab as a hi-8 theory, The Hires it's called a stoned ape Theory. Yeah, that sounds that sound of tennis.
I'm not even funny. Mushrooms out. The best
guy described that is actually Terence McKenna's brother. Dentist. Dennis is a real scientist Like a Rock Solid scientist and the way he describes it. He explains why the theory has some Merit. He never says that, it's definitely what happened. But what is the history of the mystery with the human brain size? Is that the human brain size doubles?
Old over a period of I think is like 2 million years, which is extraordinary. You have no idea what
happened. And so there's a lot of fears my brain trauma. Anyway, come on, where's Mom? This is stoned and theory is the come on jump.
He's back. Everything's good. He was just covered by the money and just listening. It's okay.
Let's go. So, that's the theory.
We missed the whole thing. Yeah, the theory
is ancient primates. Yeah, experimented with mushrooms, and they led to a rapid development and human brain size which doubled over a period of 2 million years. So the human brain size doubled and he thinks it coincides with the rainforest receding into grass.
Plans, which would give to a lot of Anjali. It's that would shit like cows. And then on those patties, they would find mushrooms and they would try them out as a food source because Kilt couchy primary.
You can grow that shit in the lab dummy playing and shit cell phone, you know.
Pesticide in the lab. Yes. Organic just means don't pesticide
wait. You only eat organic know. I hate whatever the fuck I want to eat, right? He ate six Burgers when we were out that one time. Yeah, that is one time. I did. Now you understand why we talk about food with you don't like to eat. We met you to get a hamburger.
Yeah you 83 and then there was one more on the table and you just said, this is nobody's, right?
Because sometimes they leave them there.
Because everybody's just water and shit. We got like giant tray. You don't be wasteful. I think that was a chicken sandwich to the recall recall for Alpha Brain. This is what
we think it is. I think you haven't seen recall and you think that you're dumb, but you're recall. Like, are you one of the guys? You could, you know, exactly what happened in a round of a fight that you watch 10 years ago? Not always, no, definitely not sometimes. Sometimes I get it. Yeah, a lot of time. That's pretty crazy. Sometimes I get it wrong. I'm Tom's like, I thought he did it that way. Yeah, I got. Because he heard athletes do this. Like, Bill Russell could
Could tell you every single play of every LeBron. It LeBron they say can do it. I don't know if I believe it.
That's interesting. John
McVay controlling the football
fighters don't have that. Well, they've got a fox kind of go. No fog, no more. Also, I assume not even when they win, like sometimes they just get in the zone and then before they know it they've won and then they'll watch it on camera. Go. Whoa. Look at that. Like almost like they don't remember what they die soon. If your life is on the line, that's everything is heightened, but you don't remember any of it. It's just, I have to survive. I don't think it's that is much.
Is there time so focused on delivering shots? They're so focused on delivering shots de like in a trance. What am I Theory? Yeah, eat some beef, right? Oh, come on. It's a really good. If you weren't talking about the
toughest people in the world, your maybe you're just scared theory. That would be great.
You look at would be a good fire. Yeah. Thank you.
Smart guys are good Fighters. Thanks a lot of really smart
guys. All I was I didn't say he's a very
smart dude. I have to move it for you. Call actually the worst recall. Yeah, but you start man. I was
forgetting it in 30 seconds every job. Y'all ask me for something. I talked about two weeks ago. I'm like, I don't know
man, but is that the case? Or is it just that you don't give a fuck about what they were talking
about? Like if something matters to you, do you remember still forget? Dad asked
if I read every Hindu holiday means every year
and then I forget the next
Comes
around. Well, what if that's something you'd like you is important. What if
your wife is telling you something that happened? Like, I
wasn't listening in the first place. Could you do you know? That's, that's, that's not what you want. You don't do that at home. Seem to have to this ideology. Fucking fault. You got me high. This chair goes back so far. I'm comfy, comfy choices because I'm only back here even
Come on,
it doesn't make me feel like, like sitting here like more casual. It's more casual. It's chill. Yeah, office chair. I'm always in like these little, you know, I can chairs to make you sit up like this. Yeah. Yeah, don't these hurt your back?
No, not really get a little lumbar support if you need it. Cock.
Awesome. By the way, yeah. I love that. Why does he carry the animal himself if he has a photographer? Well because of photographer doesn't carry animals for
you. Yeah what? He could get
expensive cameras. I got throw a fucking bear. Like I just love it. He got great music choice.
Has also. You know, what's interesting. What is in the New York Times bestseller list? Oh, really? Yeah, and I don't know if I'm supposed to say this because it's kind of weird, but he should have the number one book in nonfiction, but Weiss on the numbers, but they put him in self help instead, which is like, it's really weird. And yes, he's number eight in the New York Times on how to books, but he outsold the
One nonfiction book and the number one audiobook and didn't make either of those lists. You think they're hating on them. I don't know me. Why would you like, it's maybe an eye on your kids? Dude, levels. I know, but they shouldn't do that. It's so silly. It's like you have an idea of who that guy is he is super sweet guy. Wait, what's the bad thing about? He's a family man cocks hate that. He's a bow hunter. He's a very manly bow under but you know, he's also an ultramarathon Runner. He's a Savage. I want to go, my psycho. I want a piece of psycho in the nicest way possible.
So meaning that like he's the type of dude just like how many miles were run 500. Well, guess I better pack a lunch. They just keep go. So just go Hills If he if his body doesn't explode. Yeah, if he doesn't have a heart attack and died you guys met across the yeah. He came to spend guy's a beast. You should go. He's with
him. I don't want to enjoy hunting. Never been hunting. You care? That I've never been hunting.
He'll take you. Well, you do, but we can't because I wanted to,
you've never can't.
I've never gone camping. Burning Man. Was his camping, but that was inside an RV with their conditions.
A listen camping is amazing. But I recommend doing it. We're grizzly bears. Don't live. Have you wait? Why? Yeah, I don't think I don't think I would Camp. I just, I am not interested in being around grizzly bears. You have a fear of grizzly bears out. You should. Everyone should have a fear of grizzly bears was if there was only one grizzly bear and it was a myth like a fuck. If a grizzly bear can exist, but then
it was in a movie and
there was this thing that's a 900-pound predatory wild dog
that runs.
Strong through the woods. No fences. Yeah, no fences. Yeah. Oh you gonna climb a tree and got away countries break a Moose's
bat my friend watched through a scope. He was looking through like a long range scope. He watched his bare as it was chasing. Oh shit is chasing chasing the bear caught up to the Moose and broke its back with a slash it just with the Moose is fucked, slams against the side of this tree, the bear took down a fucking moose.
Those are just running around and you're gonna
You have a little cloth house that you sleep in
but what if you scare them by yelling at
them? Well, you might scare Mom. You can generally speaking here, do not want to kill you because you're
not a primary food source, right? And focus on what they try to eat the try and eat berries to try and eat animals. They try and eat a lot of fawns and calves. That's what they want. They want babies has right? And they get out that the most vulnerable and bears are on the hunt, right around the, you see this one. Where the, oh my God. It's the most terrifying. I've said, for years, that bears are my biggest fear. And you guys
Made fun of me, red, lentils. Wait, was
it? This is the polar bear. This is the polar
bear. This one is fucked, Florida. Yeah. There's Matt Bears where I live, but what's going on? Where do you live? Well, I grew up in Florida and well, there's a lot of bears in floor, but they're like little black bears. They weren't even that big bubble, but they'll still kill people, this thing right here. So this is this is him just being curious. He's just kind of like no no, no incorrect. You know, you don't think you know, that's a polar bear. He smells me and he's trying to get in there and eat that dude. That's 100% what's going on? He's not cheering. You'll see you sniffing around.
What do you
Smelled me. Look at this. That polar bear. Smells
that man's meat. That's why he's doing this. This has nothing to do with curiosity. He is trying to bite that box to eat that man, 100 million percent. I mean, this is insane. Yeah, because polar bears only eat meat. Hmm. They're not like any other bear. There's a most predatory of all bears because they don't have any other options. They don't have any vegetables. There's no grass. All they eat is
fucking SEALS, or
Anything else photographers company thing. That's their
polar bears will come for you. So what do you do in that situation? Dude, pray? I heard the most terrifying way to learn of these. Explorers. They were on ice breaker and there are ice breaker. I don't even know if it's true. What can I tell you like an ice breakers? So they're out there and wherever the polar bears live. Yeah, and they have a leak in their boat. They have to literally get off the boat because the boat sinking. Yeah, so they make their way to a nice raft. They get off the boat.
Onto this ice raft. And they wait and there's multiple hours before, someone can come get and they see a polar bear and they see a polar bear on a neighboring ice raft. Yeah, and he's looking at them. He stands up and Bloom comes out of the water and pops up on the next one next to it. And they're like, oh man, back in the water pops up in the next one, next to it until he's right next to them. He Dives in the water comes up onto their ice raft, takes one of the guys.
ABS him, pulls him into the water swims with him, over to the other one and starts eating a fuck right in front of those dudes. Holy shit. So there's standing there going.
What the fuck? And then the boat comes today. Do I have
to watch their friend? Get eaten alive by this fucking, they eat you alive to, they don't bother killing you. Do they start? He died.
From like Grizzlies or anything like that? No. No. Do I do have friends that have been chased by Grizzlies attacked by a Grizzly and what happened around Bears? Well, most of the time. It's what they're trying to do is scare. You. Most of the time, it's like a female with her her Cubs and you just zigged when he should have zagged,
that's his thing. He thinks he can zag at the right moment.
There's no zagan with bears and that's happened with friends where they got charged, you know, shot at them. Can you know, what happened with Karent? No, he never had to do that. But
Steve rinella from that. Show meat eater has a horrifying story of they had shot an elk on a fog neck Island, which is this island in Alaska with a biggest brown bears live. These things are fucking huge, man, like 11 foot tall Bears right there monsters and they killed this elk and when they went back to retrieve it, they notice bear shit. And they ignored it and I said, let's just sit down have lunch and we'll carry this beat out of there and they heard a noise and then
I turned and there was this fucking giant Beast, just running through the camp and they all stood up and guys were falling over each other. The bear was like running right past them one guy. This guy's name is dirt meth wound up on top of the bear. As it was running down the hill, shit for like 30 feet falls off onto the ground, the Bear runs off into the woods and starts huffing at them, and they scramble back to the camp. They didn't have their guns on them, the gun.
As were sitting there, all they were doing was eating lunch. They had no idea. It was going to happen this fast and then I'll send them. Then, they've got guns. They've got to try to back out of there. But the Barrett claimed, their elk of quote, took their cue got that they got up. He decided it was theirs. Oh, yeah. They got off easy. Just lost an elf. Who cares, who cares. That's the Unlucky. That's, I don't even know if they lost the whole out. I think they only lost part of it. I think they were in the process of cutting it up and shipping it, and move it. And moving it back to their Camp which was like a couple of miles away in this run.
Terrain, this thing just come out of nowhere. Yeah. Is it just the bare? Do you have to worry about? You? Got to worry about everything, man. That's the thing. That's great about the woods is that it's a human reset. He's your, when you're like, legitimately out in the mountains. It's a human reset, right? Because you realize, like, oh no one gives a
fuck.
No one gives a fuck about you. Yeah, everything here is trying to do their thing, right?
The Bulls are literally killing each other to fuck the kill you. What do you mean? They grow weapons?
Yeah, every year that doesn't compete
with the dominant male. That's the female will mate
with. Dude. Why did meet with me going to go to build rather than buy
or whatever? Yeah, that's what male competition happened. She's saying I'm going to choose the dominant male because I want the strongest jeans for my
Offspring, yeah, I control this because I got the it. Look what happened to look. They start smashing at the water. Those are two big ass bulls and they decided they both want to be the king shit of the herd. And so they have to go to war. So if you are in the woods and your elk hunting any
here, clackety, clack, clack clack, clack, clackety clack, you're like oh shit, they're fighting and
you can run in and kill one of those Bulls because they're distracted. Have you seen what they got locked up? Sometimes they'll like lock up their antlers and those die that way do
Dive watch. This personally from, you know, 50 yards away. Really? It's amazing. It's amazing to watch. It's wild. Yes, terrified. And then what happened? Well, the my situation the wind was bad and we never really could get a shot. It was like there was too much. There was too many trees and shit for us. By the time we got to them. They had smelled us and took off. What's the biggest animal? You could beat the shit out of bed. Should have a monkey. No, I'm scared of monkey would fuck me. What about a wolf? I'm not kidding.
Are see that video. Jim said,
Monkey pulls that strip of that dudes head off. Monkeys are freakishly strong, but it just climbs. This guy is like, trying to be peaceful. He's like on as long as like sitting crisscross applesauce and the monkey comes and sits on them. It's a good low. My friend is like in the monkey gets bites, his head and pulls a giant chunk of his scalp on
runs away. Can you get that up? I mean, pulls like a
fucking Subway sandwich sized chunk of scalp from this dude's head. I'm not bullshit like this big. Do we have monkeys?
He's an American. No, we do not. What about South America? South America has some monkeys. Yeah, Arian Foster. He's a football player. He said, I could take a wolf. Yeah, it's crazy. We talked about on the podcast. You did a podcast together. That's ridiculous. No chance. No impossible.
Even you, you're no,
no chance. No chance. No chance. You would get. It's literally like a machine that crushes moose bones. Okay, okay.
So no animals. Wolf's B is five times stronger than a pit bulls. Did you see this? Their teeth are designed to crush bones. Oh, this is the craziest
shit. I respect. What are you doing this situation? So
this is a, this is a family that went to Thailand for like a trip. Okay, if I'm not mistaken, so they're like hanging out and they go to like an orangutan exhibit and this is like, one of this isn't a graphic, but this is one of the things that they
do, but she's just chilling there and then yeah, they do
like an orangutan experience and this
Is what happens? He walks up behind her. Do you see stars grabbing grabbing her boob? He's smiling. Tell me how he smiles and then just dips. But I don't think I would want to be that close to an orangutan ever in my life. No, yes, not necessary. If that thing wanted to it, could pull you apart like a roll of toilet paper.
Just yeah,
you could pull you apart like you were nothing. Yeah. These people like we we think of art we do something much bigger than me like its kind of same sizes.
It's not even the same thing. Strength-to-weight ratio are made out of jelly donut. That's what it is. There's not a goddamn animal where you wouldn't be able to fight off a feral cat.
Bears of the scariest animal. I'm glad we actually clear
that. I think they're one of the scary. I accept that as an apology. The big cats might be even scarier. More afraid of a big cat.
Big cat was way more bears. I feel like I could get away or if I said you said, but I would have time for a lot of being dead serious. Where the
tiger a lion, I feel like there's nothing but when you scared me,
With the Bears. They know what? What we're do? You remember this? I've read where we were. We're at some comedy club. I told you about fear of bears, and I was like, on edge all day because I was like, going through all my childhood trauma with bears and then you just popped out of nowhere at the comedy club. I think we're, like, Salt Lake City. You have a lot of childhood trauma with bear. I mean, kind of Isaac. It was the scariest thing in the world because we would just be sitting our house and all the sudden all the trash cans would Rattle and I'm like six years old and I and all the dogs start barking crazy. And then we run outside, there'd be a bear there. And as Lord of bears a like Florida
people very unpredictable.
And smoking PCP these bags are unpredictable running from the law. We're top hats have guns. Dude, and I would go outside. No, just bump into one and I'd run
inside. I'm like 6 years old and then my family found out about, they bought a bear mask. And then we had a good move. Full bear mascot, be sleeping. In my bed,
eight years old. My brother kicks in the door, wakes me up and growling and I wake up with this is amazing.
Then they just flipped the mask inside out. Oh my God. This is like, just a
beige, only did something to do it. You know, it's still coming. Please don't, that's the
scariest animal. Real bears are fucking their weird to see because you fucking is actually see them in the wild. I got, I saw one Grizzly and it wasn't a big one. It was only about six feet tall.
But it stood up and it was looking at us. It was looking at us in a totally different way, than anything. He's ever. Looked at me. I saw a bear when I was in fucking Montana and its cub nothing to it. Didn't, I was biking. There might have been a black bear, maybe a Blackberry.
I swear to God on my life. I was at boys
Mundos. My bachelor party. We're doing a bike trail, believe you. He's fighting against the feeling that we'd his bringing inside.
Feeling
anymore. I think it passed. Oh, yeah, you're fine. Okay, let's get him a little bit more than more
afraid of big give us. Give us a blunt because we're in New York.
We gotta go smoke a backward with, oh,
yeah, pop these out on the ground. Bring the dip ones. That's too crazy for me, but
just bring out the whole thing over and then we could choose. So, here's my answer on the ground. A bear is not as scary as a shark is in the water, bro. Shark is the Apex
a more afraid of sharks way.
More
afraid of
alligators. Way more afraid of
your smoking. Back with Joe. Yeah, you really have. Yeah, who the fuck is all the best. I'm telling you a lot of
meat to New York. No, I thought this is like a Brooklyn New York thing. No, this rhetoric. Charlie Murphy introduced me to get. That makes a little more sense. Because
back in the day. He was the first guy I ever smoke blunts with I was like, oh really? I was like, this is better. Yeah. Sponsor better when you just have to admit the enjoying the tobacco. Look at. There's a conversation online with
me and Wiz Khalifa about that. He's like, why do you why do you like blondes? I go. I think I liked it Tobacco music. I'm glad you're honest about that. A lot of people. They don't want to admit that. They like that. Tobacco part. Yeah, but the de back to Tobacco is not good for you. Right. But it's awesome. But it's awesome. I would smoke. That is why I like cigars. Yeah. Shortly after a few beers. I
love cigarette
like cigars that much. But cigarette cigarettes are great. I love a sin. Well, you know, it's cigarettes. Do they give you?
They give you a head. Oh, that's nice.
You they give you right?
That's good stuff.
Cigarettes. Give you a spoken in two hours.
I'm best ever. Honestly. Why
not? Because I think it's like all. There's so many variables. There's like the quality of the competition. There's the
length of the rain. There's, you know, there's so many. There's like weight classes, like 125. Yeah, but there's a real argument. That Mighty Mouse is the greatest of all time. A real
argument. Did you see this funny against the Muay Thai
guy? Yeah, that was sick, dude. Amazing. I love them because he had to get through that first round. Rob tank. Yeah. To go to that first round. Before he can do what he likes MMA. This is crazy.
These ruleset. I like how they did
it. I'm Gabe said, get hi son. Yeah, they did 11. Women more time around
MMA. Yeah, and and then one rhomboids I want around M8. Only went through rounds. Yeah, Mighty Mouse had to do was get through that first round essentially and then he took him
down Quinn. Yeah, I got one more. No, I'm good. Okay, good. Yeah. Yeah, once you took him down, it was a wrap, but it was so much it was so
To see him like respect to distance like that. First round Rod Tango was just walking straight into him. He didn't give a fuck my mouse, even land a couple shots and but the second round, when he knew that there was a Jiu-Jitsu would play a wrestler. Anything to see him backing up, keeping like four feet in between the two of them like going. I cannot engage with this guy because if he gives me on the ground, some rat. Yeah. Yeah, Mighty Mouse is legit.
And him by leaving the UFC, and then going over and fighting with a completely different rule sets to, they have they have a thing, they did over there where they allow people to soccer. Kick your head on the ground. Yes, fire. All right. Yeah, you can need to the head on the ground and you can soccer kick. That's legitimately crazy. But is it that much crazier than the rules that exist? Yeah guys. Damn you unconscious. You can just kick the fuck. No. No, you don't mean I'm when he's unconscious you mean when I mean, it's going out. I mean, he's still awaiting here.
Yeah, no, he's right. It is tricky. It's very tricky. Part of the problem is, it's like for us to life, for one single blow. It's the one of the most powerful things a person can do because you are. It's a natural human movement, right? So natural human movement to just do that. That's so normal. Everybody knows how to run. So anybody who runs can probably kick a soccer ball pretty fucking hard? And when someone is going out, and they're already like collapsed and the referee can't get to him in time.
That person if you can't soccer kick him in the head, might survive because you get on top of them and you ground a pound of, maybe they deflect some stuff and maybe they clinched. Maybe the referee. Like, I'm he might pull out of this and he go, but if you were allowed to soccer kick, yeah, a lot of those fights are done. Are done. A lot of those fights are done, if you're allowed to soccer kick and he just go watch some of the fights in Japan, Japan allowed Soccer Kicks, but it was different because Japan allowed in a ring and in the ring, you can kind of move. Oh, what the
Bring
the cage. You can't go anywhere. So, Soccer Kicks in a cage are uniquely problematic because you could get to a position where you're pinned. Your head is pinned, the cages here and a guy could just punt your fucking face, which is Amin. I mean, I can't imagine getting hit harder than that, but it's happened. And, you know, it's it's been a big factor in the fights where it does happen where you're allowed to do that. Yeah. We allowed to kick a guy or nia.
A guy in the head with their down. And so what one FC I think is decided as they're going to allow that. That's like the Soccer Kicks. Yeah, they'll it's I've seen some rough ones. Have you ever get dropped? I've been dropped. I've never been knocked unconscious, but I got tko'd. Oh really? Yeah. I got hit with a lot. I got hit with a left hook and my legs gave out. They went like boyk. Good night. It was really interesting. It didn't hurt. Hmm. It was like it just they just shut off.
Yeah, they just shut off and then I got back up and then I got hit with an uppercut in the referee stopped the fight. Hmm. But it was, I was conscious the whole time but I was aware that I was like ready to go out sparring ever. Ever been clown ever knocked out. I've been hurt for sure. I've been dropped. I've been, you know, I probably, I don't know how many times I've been hit really hard where I had to like go home, but that's totally normal. Yeah, that's part of the problem with any
Kind of combat sport is like when you're learning. It's not just the fights that you have that give you damage. It's also all the training which job was talking about what training with that guy Shane Carwin. Yeah. He said Shane you still like ring his bell all the time. Yeah, like that's where I would see a lot of guys that had like one pro fight. You know, Jerry Quarry is how do you spell do the Box? Jerry Quarry the Box? Yeah, the boxers a famous story because Jerry Quarry for
Muhammad Ali. And, you know, it was like a lot of people's eyes. Like, wow. How did he hang in there with Muhammad Ali? Like, sort of like this story where people like romanced in like he he only gave it a great shot. Yeah, but he was one of those guys that was a very good fighter in an age of very great Fighters and he fought the best of the best and took some tremendous beatings, but his brother, who I
I think had very few fights had just as much brain damage as him. Wow, his brother and him used to spar with all that training and part of it. So it's not one or the other. I was obviously, fighting Muhammad. Ali is terrible for your brain. Yes, right. Obviously. All those other great, great Fighters, he fought, but the probably terrible brain, but those sparring sessions, cannot be denied. Dude. There's you know, who James Toney is fuck. Yeah. Course, you know, fuck. Yeah. James.
Amazing boxer and he also played Waltrip no know who he played. Frazier. Not from Walt Frazier, but Jill for him in the alley movie. The one with Will Smith. Oh, yeah, remember anyway, so I never watch that movie. To be honest. I want
you to watch movies. You'll fucking watch him. But did you see everything everywhere all at once?
No, I haven't because I haven't gone to the movies. Yeah, I'm waiting for have you spoken to re about streaming? Yeah. Yeah. He loved it. He loved we had like a long. What do you see first at or Top Gun? Well, you got to see Top Guns.
That I'm gonna see that Top Gun. I've got to be high. So I'm going to be the old Top Gun. You can't watch Top Gun sober. Yes, you can not me. Why not? I need to be intoxicated.
What's that? What's that? No, I guess. We take a break for a second because I got to
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Now, let's get back to the
show. No, who's the hottest guy
question? Probably Thor. Right? Do
you want Chris fucking? Don't do that? Right? Kind of does not knocking on
Chris Hemsworth's door, but you don't get that big without immense amounts of hard work. There's no way you just
People think he always just taken steroids, bro.
Relax. Can you get those girls out the screen? And can we get back to that hot guy? Mark? Thank you. My bad. Yeah, he's got. He's
adblocker bro, Saint Alice trying so hard to participate
is so funny. Who's your number one guy? Who is it? Okay,
go it.
It's the guy from This Is
Us. Yeah. Yeah. It's
obviously in a white guys,
with the white guy from this is yeah. Oh wow,
Justin Hartley, Justin,
Hartley. He's no more, bro. He's done. Is he a brunette brunette?
That's like the ultimate insult. You no problem, bro. What your no Thor? I mean who is
not your number?
The fucking planet show. That's the guy who know that's Jim. This is the guy. Here's Morgan is not Thor. God, but now it's okay, right? Like oh, yeah, he's pale face.
Yeah, pick it. All the same guy. Like,
I'm number one. I got
Idris Elba, really? That's okay.
He just has a confidence about it.
All for me.
That's right, please, let's do something you see. You're assuming you would be the top. He's assuming he would be, that's what that was.
You're not doors bottom. No, I don't think that, but I don't think I don't think about going that way. You're the one who submitted this. You can talk about Thoreau know what he's blonde. He wouldn't. No. No, I got it.
Most people man is Jesus. No, Jesus God.
I'm gay fire stores or Malibu for American Gladiator,
bro. Oh, yeah, Mark got ombre in his hair, one time because a Malaga is the one that
was my number one, kind of got it, bro. Come on. Have
you ever been to a Furry Convention?
Pittsburgh. And the day we flew into town was the
same day.
As a Furry
Convention. Okay. So we landed the
airport. Yeah, we get the rental car. We're driving to the
hotel in the, where were like, what the fuck is going on. So what you do? You like, hop out and suck their dicks, or, but animal marijuana's not good for everybody. If we've learned anything today. It's don't give in to peer pressure. Imagine winning some drug addict.
Don't listen to them, bro. He's much more. Hi, I'm not high, but I got a pistol. You should probably go ahead and do that. Hold on to the Furry Convention. Go, you guys pull up. So, who is it? It's you
who don't remember who was with me at the time. It was probably some of the folks that worked at the UFC. We're probably don't remember, but remember that as we were on our way to the hotel. We're like, why is everyone dressed like a mascot? Yeah. Yeah. It was like, what is going on?
And we're passing on what the fuck is happening here. And then somebody figured out that it was a Furry Convention. By the time we got to the hotel. We became friends with the guy, works, the front desk, and he goes, dude. I'm so glad normal. People are
staying here. I mean, what do you mean?
He goes, most of the hotels furries are, you know, what I can? Well, what's the big deal you do? They want a litter box. No, they asked for a litter box to put in the front Courtyard. I do
what discuss they literally
asked.
A request, a litter box. They were eating all of their food off of bowls,
bro. I'm like, no, dude. It's it's like there's different Little Boxes water. If some of
these people are like, Asians doing the party drugs and fucking each other while they're wearing their costumes and never take the costumes off. I love that Vernon bit. I
mean, that's, that's not you think that's that.
Ready? I don't think it's that crazy. I just don't like the boxes. Fucking the Big Bang. Yeah, they got to have them,
picks our bodies though. The Pixar animals are
fired. That's my point. Pixar animals. Got the dumpsters,
but I don't like to their cartoon animals. Like I like animals. If you're gonna dress up like one be if
the one that scared you as a child, you really like rainbow shirt.
A Pink Floyd shirt that crazy. Do you like pink floyd--? Oh,
fuck. Yeah. He loves them the Gaze on the rainbow. We all know
this. Yeah, really?
Yes. Yes. We pink. I don't like the point at me
when you say game. But he pointed to me is like the game. They got that bring up that damn. And how do we get back? The
rainbow? We have to share it. They can keep it. I bet of crimson
Crimson. Come on, bro.
Merry Christmas, back it up to my brain tells me,
you know, about back it up. Terry, back it up Terry. You haven't seen back in that tank.
I might've it's you definitely see. Greg it up. Terrible. Mark. Please get back up to pull it up. Back it up.
Okay. Hold on my scared. You never see. This is actually really fun.
That volume up bro. This is unreal. Okay, so it's we're fucked. All right. So this dude Terry's in a wheelchair is a motorized wheelchair. He's lighting a fire work with his family on Fourth of July. Oh, no, okay. Okay.
Only two cars coming the being safe.
Two cars, come too.
Oh my God, come on. You want to see a dude? Get his hand
blown off by a
firecracker?
What do we got Telltale? Mark? That's trying to
find this video. Here it is. I found it. Watch.
This is great. This is so what
you gonna say? So these guys are drinking excessively or Paul Vitti and one guy has a firewall if it's taken.
Watch those.
So the drink firework goes off in here. Realize that shit have any so job and now no, no.
Now this shit is this the guy who just had the firework go off in his hand stands
up.
And he's holding up his hand. Oh, yeah, watch this. Watch this. It's like the white boys dress is very easy.
I mean, I don't know what happened is hand, but that should never happen to your hand.
Oh, that's crazy. It's a claw. Okay, bro.
Why are you so hot? I do. This is embarrassing.
I'm fine. I'm not, you're not high at all. I don't think so. I don't think he's an ass. Hi. Yeah, you guys are so damn lucky. He's most you guys. Such rookies, you get high and you go you. Hi. I'm good.
This is the valley is Joey
Diaz used to get so mad at me. When I first started getting high. It was General. That I'm tired of hearing about this. I know you're fucking high.
We're all
the rookies. Always want to talk about high. They are. Yeah, Changing State. Just let it go. Yeah. All right. All
right, let it go. Let it go. Watch. This dude's fingers.
Get much by a lion. Oh my gosh. This is the dumbest fucking thing of all time. This one, I guess I feel a little better about because he's kind of support for but how many fingers did he lose? Nope?
Spoiler alert, how many? Oh, fuck me dude. So he's fucking with his
life. Fuck me, bro. And then
Jesus don't make me watch this again. And again and again.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. He does deserve it though is the thing like you're not going to
win? Yeah, Brian the more you pull it.
I thought
I'd stop stop. Yeah, that was crazy doubt.
He's gonna pull up more for sure. Yeah.
Tell me about
the mouth line that I saw in Utah. No, is that a lake now? This was in the woods. We were driving. Luckily because we were in a car. We rent a truck. And this do does with my friend Colt. He stops the truck. Go stop. Stop. Look under that tree. I go. Oh my God, you see a big cat big with a head like a pumpkin. It's like 30 yards away and I have binoculars on so I'm looking at it through binoculars Mike, holy.
Lee shit man, it's like 180 pounds just as fucking cash
sitting
big-ass pumpkin head wild eyes that are reflecting the headlights off of the truck. Like this is crazy and then add Arts behind that trees. And it's off in the woods like like gone, like nothing. Oh my God, you just when you see something like that, that's that close to you. Physically. You will. You like what
this idea?
Good when it comes for me and my see you ain't doing
shit, but do the nothing. You ain't doing nothing. But dying. You don't doing nothing. It is humbling, right? You get a reply and we like I was in a car it
was in the car and it was terrified. Why do I people do this shit?
I had just that board, who's in the car. Why do we do it? Joe felt pretty safe. I've never seen.
Because I
know it's a lock Corey from now on at Bellator, used to be used to fight for the UFC. Where's that cigar? You want the shrooms know the cigar lighter hair?
I don't get it.
You don't got it.
You haven't done it. But if you did it, you would get it. Like if you eat
meat and you actually get a chance to go and get it yourself. It's a different experience. Remember, talking about this. I
was like, do you think we'll ever get the dopamine hit that
people back in the day? Got from like bringing a fucking deer back to their tribe or something. We'll never get that level of satisfaction of like killing something, and then bring it back and then everybody gets to live for sure. It's like if you you catch a fish right, you get excited, why? Because a long time ago that meant your family would eat.
That's why it's exciting. I've got a
big one. Oh shit. Oh shit, even if you're not gonna keep it
if you don't like Catch and Release, yeah, you still excited. If you get a bank, their solution of
read everybody. Yeah, I'm gonna live today. I'm gonna live. So that's what the fishermen are tapping into the guys who just release 100%. Yeah 100%. Do you deny
that? No one would deny that it Taps into like ancient genetic Memories. We have of catching fish to feed our village. Yeah. We have a we have a
buddy.
Fish with branches,
born until you finally catch it, right? But when you get what I was saying, this is like, Hey, we're finally doing
some but you might not be into it.
I'm not saying that you're into it so much so that the boring Parts like fishing is boring as fuck. Until it's not. Yeah, that's what fishing is. So if you don't like the boring Parts enough to get to the where it's not boring.
There's no big deal. But the experience you get when it's not boring is undeniable everybody. When you catch a big
fish. I'll go check.
You see coming. Its genetic, man. It's like in our system that's going to feed us. That's why we it's a like a weird Primal jolt of excitement. Hmm, and it's built in memory because you had to have that because it would reward you for providing for your family. Do people get that same thing out of a cookie.
I bet ya ain't like this is a satisfaction. You get from cooking. I can't imagine it's anywhere near the
same. No, not the same, but I guess I'm trying to understand like why there is
This Love of Cooking. And it has to be baked into our DNA a little bit because you're providing a meal for these people that you love. Yeah, it's not like it's probably more similar than you would think because I think like when someone decides to cook for a group of people and they all sit down and really love it. I bet they get it excitement. That's very similar to
Like when a successful Hunter knows he's going to feed his family. It's like a thing. Like you provided like you gave you gave a bunch of people, a good feeling. That's that's really that's all about. Yes. They probably dark tribe if you will. Yeah, right like yeah, you're rewarded for it with a dopamine Rush. Yeah. We're all little dopamine junkies. Hmm. I mean, that's what you're doing when you're trying to kill, try to get smart.
Just want to get big laughs when it does that does that feel like when you shoot the elk or whatever with the bow and arrow like that's
no nothing. Does it feel like stand-up? No, no, no. No, but but the things, the think this is what's similar about them. How do you have to Robin that? So don't know you sometimes. But it's, it's dip. This is why.
Let him get off at the most fun. Fun. Never.
Don't talk to Moose by the way. What is there? The one animal that
will kill you in the deer species? What? He'll chase you down and kill you. But how would they kill Deva stomp you to death moose? Will they regular stop people to death? It's a normal thing. If you most people avoid them at all costs, but if you fuck up and you're too close to a moose, they'll come for you. They're different. They're different than any other wild animal because they deal with Wolves so they look real good at stomping.
Yeah, that's real. That's how we'll
Smith Brothers. Not a little slap. That's a
stop. That's the real.
1,800 pounds when they're the giant bowls. Yeah. I might have made that up.
Remember we were talking about elq fighting and how crazy it is. Yeah,
moose fighting is next level. Why can't I
pull it out? Elq is the welterweight division. Moose are heavier, looser. Double the elk, double for double the size of the do, the 1,400-pound.
Have you ever seen the
movie taal? Huge, their fucking gigantic? I've eaten the most. So, what's more dangerous for humans movements 100% or bare bears for stores?
Because you've been avoiding the most human, you get avoid the Moose. If you're
really smart and you don't frighten them and you don't get between them and their calves, your fine. They don't want to fuck with you. They're worried about you as a threat bears are worried about you as a threat to if they have Cubs, but they also might be predatory. Hmm.
A bear could be very hungry. Especially older bears, like that guy, Grizzly, Man. You ever watched a doctor.
That was crazy.
What? Bro, you never watch? Grizzly. Know what's great. They look, it's the craziest documentary ever. Well, look at the size of these motherfuckers. Hmm.
Look at the size of these fuckers. These are like
1,500 pounds or 1400 pounds that like an enormous animals. Yeah, was huge like saloon doors.
Grown out of sight. Look at the size of them.
There are
immense and for them to survive like they have to be able to fend off Predators. So if you just get too close to them, they'll just fuck you up because they might, they don't know what you are than ever seen a person. They probably think you're a wolf. Yeah, you know, you get like next to a mother. A mother bull. If there's a bull elk. He might go after you, if you like interrupt him. Hmm. If you get too close, where he feels threatened by you, but the, the cows will stop you if they have children. Mmm have a
Friend who lives up there and my friend. Mike, shout out to Mike. He was on his horse and he was running from a cow moose. She was chasing him and the horse was running full throttle and barely getting away from this cow that had decided to chase after him because they had gone to close to her calves. That's that's real world. That's not Twitter.
Okay. Are you fucking people in her?
Putting your pronouns, your Twitter bio. Look at that. That's real world.
Yeah. Yeah. We need to go hunting
boys. Yeah. I want to go on a hunt of. You gotta be so that if you have something like this something you don't need, you know, you definitely don't want to be around. What would you do if you were on a hunt like out? What do you think his role can almost Scouts know if you could gonna honey, I'll be I'll carry you. I'll carry your Weaponry that if you're going to go, this
is how you should.
If you really want to do it, okay, if you wanted to go on a hunt, you should go hunt something that's like ethical where you really, there's really an, there's an imperative like they have to remove them. Like wild pigs. That's a great example. It's a great thing to hunt because they literally have to they, it's a terrible. The word calls terrible. The killing them because there's millions of them. They're destroying agriculture. Texas has a fucking giant number of wild pigs, so I can tell you that
look.
So if you
wanted to do a hunt where you would get meat out of it, you get the full experience and its really doing good. That's the best Hunt is pigs. Wild pig, but I'm going to do that helicopter. What I think that's the lilies do not. You want to do one like on the ground. Yeah, you want to do like a real pig hunt and it's not that difficult, these guys shoot them at night. That's a lot of people do that. They do it with thermal scope.
Pussy. Yeah, I want to be during the day I want. If there's two things going on at the same time. There's like how close do you want to get to a fair fight, which is ridiculous. You don't want to get close to also, don't call anybody a
pussy to. You got eradicate them. You gotta wrap
eradicate them. And what's the most efficient way possible? Is there. An animal that doesn't or vegetable attacks humans? Other than I'm scared and I think he's a threat. Yeah. Yeah, if strikes as they can eat you a lot of it.
Animals, they think they can eat you a woman in Canada. Got killed by Coyotes. She was 19. She was like, this promising folk singer and she was like, hiking in the woods and she got killed by Coyotes. Yes. See that's the thing about being white is you just got to do these fucking hike. Look at him assuming this girl
was white. Wow. She doesn't matter.
Folk singers, Canadian folk singer on a high. That's a good one. You're absolutely correct, sir. I'll be right back. I gotta take, please get in there. Fellas. You guys continue. You've been to this is Joe Rogan's playground, right now. This is what it is.
The show baby. Keep rolling bitch. Tell the director has spoken.
Yeah. How was the the marijuana treating you? Right now? I had this is either let it be and I feel fine. I don't think you did. I don't know
if I can smoke more. I think more. Here's
the thing. I'm not I don't want to be concerned about it. But I feel like this is the only time I get high in a long time. Never been high, get high, but I also don't want to get fucking stupid baked where I'm useless on the podcast, right? I know funny it would be didn't see me. Fall asleep threshold and
At least, you know the cap. Now, you can just next time. Just tell you that's a bit drunk advice. Yeah, right. I don't
want to do it a bunch. Maybe not. Maybe never do it again. I'm look your company. I feel like I should smoke weed with you. Thanks, very much. Yeah, I'm honored everyone
so high on a pot that you couldn't function. What is couldn't function
eigenfunction poorly,
get a little bit more High. He's fought. What do you do?
Doing
all the time. I'll piece of it. I'll give you trying to make
content goddamn content creators.
What a bunch of losers, huh? Plugging YouTube Stars. Come on. Who does that? Would it make your own show? Great.
Well, your rules, you can't follow everybody's rules and that amazing that that's like the best thing you can do right now is this.
Yeah, the best thing we can all do is this? Yeah, that's the best thing I ever did it. Do you? This is where I'm listen, man? It's no one's indebted to anybody. We're all indebted to each other. If there was only one person doing it wouldn't be any fun. I can't think of a single thing. You might possibly owe
me.
No, man. No one, owes anybody, anything, your we're all benefiting, like we all benefit from being a part of a group of fun. Interesting people. We all benefit and it doesn't like
You know, you can make tallies and decide like who benefits this, and who benefits that, but it doesn't matter. What matters is the only way any of this shit is fun is is is if there's many people doing it. Yeah, the only way it's fun is if you have all your friends having a great time, doing the exact same thing, like everybody's trying to do the thing, everybody's doing their own version of the thing. I don't do it. I don't think you realize that is a completely different Paradigm. That's like a completely.
That's not we grew up in at all. And I do think you are the Forefront of that. You have to put yourself there, but you are well we can all eat. This is for everybody that's brand-new. Will you have to recognize where weakness is and you like, we're what bothers you about you, you know, and what one of the things that bothers we used to bother me about me is that I would get weirded out by other people who are better than me. It's tough and I would not like them. Mmm, and I feel like, why do I not like them? Because they're better than me.
So I'm like, what is that? Fucking weird weakness? Yeah, and I realized it was like a fear that there was like a finite amount of success that existed. Yes, and then, you can only, you can only have a certain amount for yourself. And if you were around other people that were doing well with somehow another, take something away from you. I reared, I used to hate complimenting other people, and I think I was just so scared to show any vulnerability that I wouldn't do it. And I'm like, yo, if I like anything you do, you deserve all the praise. I never.
Want to hold that back. I'm just making this person feel not as good as he could. Yeah, I learned how to do that from a guy. Who is a pool Hustler here. I was really good friends with a dude. When I lived in White Plains, while I always play pool and White Plains. I lived in New Rochelle. Yeah, New York and I met this dude. His name was Johnny and he was like this, mathematical genius, who was also homeless, who was a pool Hustler? Well, and when I met him, he tried to hustle me in a game of pool. I was terrible. What are you talking about?
He was full of shit. He's funny. Right? And I saw him there a bunch of times, we became friends, but he was like the first guy that I ever met that would tell you what, he liked about, the thought, the stuff that you did. He would come with me to comedy shows and he'd be like, dude, that thing that you're doing and he would like go into this like explanation. I loved it. Right? And he would have like, give you like, I know your, your generation likes to call it, give you flowers. Yeah, he would give you even give
you love, who would
give you love that.
I was like, oh, Nobody Does this. Everybody like kind of, like never compliments their friends? Yeah, and I'm like, oh, this doesn't hurt you to do that. I'm like, it doesn't change anything. But that's what I'm saying is, that's how different that thought is of what you're doing. Is back in the day. You were a legitimate Hustler. If you make people feel good about themselves, you're a con artist and now it's like, gosh is what we should do. Yeah, people, he was a con artist but not like in the sense that he like, it was almost like a half of a joke because he was a like a world class professional.
A pool player. Like he was just crazy. Yeah, and he had all sorts of like he was always trying to convince me to drive him to Harlem. So that it was why it was a wild friendship because I was a young boy at the time and I was pretty fucking straight-laced. Because most of my time, like all through high school and into the time. I was like 21, I was doing Martial Arts Tournament, so I didn't drink the ever, right? Mostly didn't do anything. I was pretty like on the grind.
And I met this dude who smoke crack.
Yeah, don't cut too drunk and he
was gambling. He'd stay up and sleep. I would meet him in 24-hour. Pool halls. Like I would have like an audition in Manhattan in the morning and I go. Hey, man, I go. I got an audition in the morning. Are you going to be at Chelsea? And I'd beat him at Chelsea village where he was sleeping. Chelsea, Billiards was a 24-hour pool hall and dudes would sleep under the tables. So just go to sleep. They didn't have a place to live. They just stated Chelsea. They gave themselves like whore.
Has bathroom. Yeah, you know with like fucking paper towels or what and but that was the first time that I ever met. They're like, he would talk about like, even people he didn't like he would have like like this guy's a fucking asshole. He goes, but watch how he does this fire. Yeah. It was amazing like he would he would tell me what they did wrong and he like, explain. It's all fucking. He goes all their old bullshit. They get scared when they think they might win, who he was. He had this like mindset of Understanding Psychology, but
It. Look at a guy that he fucking genuinely hated until you do. He does that really? Well. That's a beautiful thing. He was honest guy, you know, he's a wild crazy do, but he's an honest guy and he was honest about all the time. So it's like I just sort of adopted that. Yeah. So the time I guess I was like 23 or some shit. Yeah. Yeah. Well I met this dude. Yeah, maybe 24 somewhere and somewhere in that range and we started hanging out together and I was like, what a fuck?
And interestingly the guy could play piano, he could do math in his head. Like you could have a calculator and you go 500 divided by 6 minus 7 plus 11 to go to 65, but that's not what the
real be able
to do it like that. And we would do it with calculators. It was like a trip that we would do at the pool hall where people would like, let him they would gamble with it. He would tell people, he could do that. He would gamble with it. Wow, wow, and they would like to
Calculations and he can keep up with fucking calculator. He could play piano again with the Mike Brown.
You ever? You're a play pool. The guy named
Nick Schulman Nick schwarmann way to I went to school the kid. And when we were in like is your profession, well, he became a hustler. This is when Amsterdam was like way, uptown. Yeah, I played there and there was another one on the east side, called York or something.
There's another one
on the Shelf. Where's the big 186?
Remember? No right here. I
mean there was a Chelsea right place. Then there's the floor.
Yeah, but what was the one on 86 between like second and third or something. Anyway, this kid in high school, he would just like he would stop going high school. I went to middle school with him. We stopped going to high school and you became a hustler. Oh, I don't know how these guys make money. That's the thing you don't make much, but the thing is, the camaraderie, the pool hall is so fun. When I was a young man, and I first started hanging out in pool halls because I really didn't play.
Until really didn't actually play pool toes
21 and I just had this girl that I dated. She was owed to the man. She was really competitive
and she wanted to play pool. This she's touching is good at
pool. Yeah. She's always trying to beat me at pool. I got you and
and I decided that I wanted to get good at pool because I didn't want to get beat by this girl. Yeah, so I practiced a little bit and I still sucked but I had this weird bug where I was trying to get good at.
It and then when I moved to New York, I fucked my knee up. I tore my ACL fighting how no, no. Just training just hitting the bag at the time. I just something Twisted. Weird. It was we're real straight. It might have been hurt already. But anyway it blew out and
I couldn't do anything. Physical like it's like anything like with my legs for like I was like six months. At least it's crazy. I have a knee brace and shed. And so I started playing pool with my friend, John and we were hanging around these pool halls and I was like, oh, this is like, a weird thing that these people are doing. There are figuring out how to control their emotions. Like, this isn't as simple as a game. It's like all these people get together and they all puzzle on how to control their emotions under extreme pressure. And they're all trying.
To gamble more and more money to make the stakes higher. But it's all about who can control their emotions and who can keep that arm straight under extreme pressure. All right, guys, we take a break for a second because some of y'all need to get a new bongs smoke out of smoking out of these wack-ass bongs. I was probably throat hurting like crazy because, you know, got the glycerin Chambers, keep them nice and Frozen. So the smoke comes out. I see Goes Down. Smooth comes out, smooth. Okay, not hacking coughing away.
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show. Yo, guys, also the big Daisy energy to wear the one we never got to finish because the pandemic is back. I
said we're going
On a tour. We're hitting a lot of big cities. We're selling the fuck out. What do we do? This
is what we do. We sell this shit out the way we're going to do, if the pandemic didn't
stop us. So go to Akash thing.com for tickets. We are going to be everywhere. We sold out Austin. We're heading to Zanies this weekend in Chicago and Rosemont, Dallas and Fort Worth hyenas at the end
of June Cobb's Comedy
Club in San Fran. We're doing Vancouver Orlando. We're doing the Palisades guys. We are going everywhere, go to Akash Singh, da de Kum for all those dates and plenty.
More dish is going to be crazy. Let's get back to the
show is Elon
compromised. What does that even mean?
Well, I don't think I was like, no way. We might be compromised by the aliens. Yeah, because he
was a little easy to dismiss. Aliens who deals with the real, the very subtle. Yeah. He didn't want to go into it at all. Well, I didn't like his pyramid here stuff, either. One of the reasons why, baby, just like from a pragmatic perspective. God does one podcast with me.
Get them. Smoke weed is stock drops. Yeah, NASA's mad at them saying that, wait a minute, and then he bounces back and everything's fine. So next time on the podcast, probably better to dismiss aliens or
some
nonsense. He like I don't know. I don't think he has time to think about aliens, dude. Runs five fucking companies. Yeah him. It'd probably be really convenient. If aliens just stay the fuck out of his way. Yeah, he's got shit to
do.
Like if they'll and it's going to
ruin everything. Like, if aliens land don't kind of chaos, it would be, you think it's bad right now with the Republicans versus the Democrats? Like what happens when the aliens when I think it's better? You think we all linked up. That's
the only time we were just exploring sent astronauts out to space.
We don't
I'm with any our mission. Do you know what an eater robot? I don't got guns. Another one is that
and either robot is a robot that runs on biological material. Don't make that they've
already made it. It's a
robot that's powered by biological material. So I'm just saying, worst case scenario. Okay. This is a robot that eats bodies on a battlefield to stay to stay alive. And that's how it powers itself.
That's what you can say. You can say, no, we don't
Don't mean biological material in that way. We need mean plant matter. Mmm, you know, dead rodents and what have you? There's a real fucking robot that they designed that
eats biological material. Has it. The US has as fuel. It's called the
e80, our Google
e80, our robot right now. Yeah, Wendy. What do you think
this thing, man? There's a fucking robot that it could eat by.
Bodies
and it turns it into fuel. Yeah, we ins killer, I mean robots. Kill us. Oh, yeah. Akash is a big robot?
Cause I don't think they would want to. Yeah, here's the thing. Like, why would they want to? Why would they not want to? This is a cigar? Oh, nice. Well with it's not, why would they not want to? Because they would not act a logically, we would have to give them a reason to kill us. If they wanted to kill us robots, and I just kind of kill us for no reason, right? If we're not a threat anymore. What do they give a fuck?
Look, but don't we really make everything real. Talk? Everything worse for every other species?
Oh, don't even say works. Just say less
efficient. Like it might be easier for out of
here. Right? Yeah, or just like if you're looking at the world you like. Hey, there's what's the biggest problem? That's hurting the world. It's humans. It's
not. This is so hilarious right now. So we're so cynical. We like it's impossible for us to change. So let's just assume that
will never stop shitting all over the world and the robots are going to want to kill
us. I do assume that.
Yeah. Okay. Here's question. Do you
think it son?
There to tell, okay, how to wear this.
You know, how we had our Industrial Revolution, right? My man. What just happened? We had the worst hand might have, but you know how, we had our like time to
fuck the environment up.
No other countries compared to the environment. Well, why can we tell them not to?
Well, we have no moral High Ground. That's what I'm saying. Like we had our time.
I'm in the sun. Now. They have
theirs. It's okay. Let them use it. I
mean, I'm not aware of what the environmental regulations are all around the world. Obviously. I've not studied that but I do know that it's a problem. Almost everywhere where people burn coal and where people, you know, like coal burning is crazy you ever see those documentaries on people that live in. There's a certain area of Indiana where there's a bunch of alcohol, plants near October.
Guy, who is about. It's nasty. Like you go by people's cars. You could just like swipe your hand on a windshield and you have this cold dust like it's in the air people, breathing it, right. All kinds of people are having all kinds of respiratory diseases. As I suck on the cigar
fucking poisoning people. These people are poisoning people for sure
and they're doing it in the name of making power, like a coal-fired power plant that does that you should start it, you go.
Go. I have an experiment this let's see what happens when we burn coal and make electricity. Okay, let's try it. Oh, it's super efficient. Seems to work really well, but really fucks up the sky. Yeah, let's not do that. It should be like, let's not fuck up the
sky back then. Let's fuck up. This guy just in this spot. Yeah, like
that's what fracking
is the fuck up. The water right here. Can touch the other water. A couple of fish.
Electric to these people. The indigenous communities need electricity cracking, letting the make bigger casinos. It's the craziest shit any. No, no. Fucking
predecessors of ours would have never guessed that. We'd be hanging on this long, really like this, with the way we are like this. Yeah. Well, how much longer you think? We got? Not much time. Wait, really? Yeah.
I think, unfortunately, the way things have unraveled over the
last telling you this
time, zero faith, that we're going to keep this thing glued together for another 10 years or 20 years robots. Some
cataclysmic. A so much thinking tree of generation thinks that
you're living through it. Like all this shit can't get worse than it is right. Now, my parents never thought the world's gonna end in 10 years. I'll tell you that right now. Tell that to the residents of Nama sake, where's not misaki?
Nagasaki Nagasaki, it would have been way better if I got the
name, bro. Mario yamasaki. Yeah, but I'm trying to be crafty. I choke Under Pressure laughs fuck. I just
want to apologize to anybody. I might have insulted doing this
podcast with in myself.
Your namasthe
fond of chemicals. Since the mom we got here, Andrew, Schultz, insisted that we get intoxicated. This is not true. That is
true. This is a Joe Rogan IDU pressure doesn't miss, I do like Madness. I'm not gonna lie. I
tried to start a team with some steak talk. You know what I like? I
like mad with food Portion, talk like that - with nice people. Why did I think that was the best way to begin the talking?
Let's meet the moment. I didn't think about that much. Every podcast is like a
small little Colt, it walks on baby legs and then it's kind of develop a little trial when it gets
going when we're at home asleep. Fuck dude, dude. Hey, can we talk about one crazy conspiracy? Do I'm gonna pee? So bad Fargo. PD Gopi? We got this. Okay. Do you know where the P room is? I'm gonna piss right on.
Yeah.
I don't know, you know Debbie, but I really don't respond to peer pressure order pizza from all the places. I'm a God. I'm a new man. It's not gonna get here. We're getting pizza. From all the places. There's a piece of stuff. We're getting pizza roll and get some fucking pepperoni and shit and get mix it up. If Joe Rogan wants peace of again, Peaceable, simple as that. I do not ask for peace of just like I did not ask this to be a
Duncan intoxicated again. This isn't play along with this is suggestion. They want to make. He said, that's true. That's true. That's true.
I need, I need your own meat Parks number
before you leave a dog.
We set each other. So many emojis of the weightlifting, the way dog. It was a squat Emoji. Never done that. Listen guys like your fucking nose, on fire. Don't
don't, don't worry about it, bro.
I got a couple of for head hairs. I didn't like
twinge. Um, that's what happens. You lose all your hair on the head and you get them in the
area your
hairs. Yet. I get one on this one right here. It's a sure sign of misfiring. The DNA is reverting back to Monkey stuff. Growing fucking ear hair and sugar as you slowly Fade
Away how long you think
Years. Well, Joe Biden gets re-elected. I think I got about
four. Wait really think? No, man. Who do you think goes after Joe?
Can I be thoughtful and compassionate? Can I be empathetic? No, you cannot, that's what makes it unbelievable. Oh, okay. That's a good-ass point. No, you make a good ass Point. Joe Biden, Alpha Brain, Black Label. Go get some. If it's legit and work there.
Yeah, I'm a Living Testament. I barely got out of high school. I'm a phenomenal memory. Do you recall is crazy about? Take this shit Alpha by Alpha Brain because I said to, but there's a bunch of other stuff. You should try. Joe. We've been promoting Alpha bring a potluck.
No. No, there's stuff that helps your brain will just suck last one to get chisel, narrow Gumball. You want to
get back? Yeah. He wants to get back. Yeah, big. He went to be like, slim, like his body is felt
like, Yeah, Joe, what everything you take?
Everything every that was sexual most tonight. Most of it is like the big
results come from testosterone replacement. So there's that. And then there's peptides that increase your body's ability to grow hormones. Like growth hormone and what you have one,
there's magic. Yeah.
This BBC 157 and there's another thing. Now what dummy?
You see, I think it's immoral if Google BBC. I'm gonna fucking these names up and then the other ones called thymosin
and what these things do.
Was the they help your body produce the hormones that it should have when you're younger and your body works better. And if you do that and you regularly exercise, that's the biggest thing. If there's ever one thing that someone can do to stop aging, its lift weights and don't stop, don't do it for vanity, do it because you want to keep your tissue like think of it as like age is like a little demon that slowly robbing you of your tissue.
Christian, your ability to walk upstairs, the ability to open up jars, your ability to open a car door when it's frozen, all that shit is real. And the only way to Stave that off is weightlifting. You have to lift heavy things and you have to, you don't want to do anything too heavy. We hurt yourself. But you want to get your body accustomed to this idea. That in order to survive. It has to lift things, and you need to give that body nutrients. And I don't care. If you look lift your own body, your body's heavy, you can do.
Ups and push ups and body squats. That's all great stuff. You don't need to lift heavy weights in terms of your own body is assuming at least 100 pounds. It's pretty fucking heavy. When I do kettlebells. I don't do anything heavier than 70 pounds. For the most part. That's the heaviest. Should I ever left? So, it's mostly just full body motion. That makes your body know that this is a regular part of your life. So, the normal deterioration that most people experience, you can Stave that off for the most part. And
and there's a real potential in the future with genetic editing and all kinds of wacky,
shades of their experience experimenting
on all sorts of stuff that could extend life spans and of radical
whisper, whisper whisper. Yeah
this crisper but there's a couple other things they're doing to live and who knows what the fuck they're doing in China. Yeah. What do you mean? They could be doing anything? Because they
don't, there's no restrictions by the same.
Yeah, they don't have to tell anybody, they can work like hand and fist with the
And nobody has to know nothing about what's going on. You know, that's why they can develop all kinds of shit. Without like the normal restrictions their government, and their businesses, like
that are
inexorably connected, the businesses. Don't get to make decisions that are bad for the government. If they do, they disappear, dudes. Okay here, let's go conspiracy theory.
Let's go how different how different. Oh, okay. I see miles.
Conspiracy more than the high God. Okay. Here's the
conspiracy
are Jo Koy and Chelsea Handler really in a relationship.
There could marry. I want, I want to just say what I think you said, because you said middle age.
We love Joe on this
podcast. Oh Chelsea. I love Chelsea. Well, I like wrote a thing about one of her books or I wrote a little blurry. Oh really back in the desert.
Yeah. She was no comments or she was always
cool. No not back her show. She was great. She was great. Her interviewing was great. It was different. What happened tone? This room. Just change the bullshit.
Old tone. Well, let's say something nice right now.
Yeah, that's real fat, momma. Yeah. I love that. That's the thing. It's like I don't like trash and fellow
comedians. No. No, I genuinely genuinely don't know. Did that change after Mencia? You felt a little best 100%.
Really? So you felt that during
the moment of it. I realized how much negativity that creates. I was almost looking at like like if it was a system, right? If you're looking at a system, you look at it like you input X and you get back this. And I'm like, okay, a good thing was done, where people weren't in danger of having their intellectual property taken by someone who's far more successful. Hmm. But the weird thing was the anger like watching.
Wow, it's like you're throwing meat to a group of fucking piranhas. Like, this is buzzing of people joining a one side or the other side and I realized like a lot of this is not logical, and it's one of the problems with the way human beings interact with each other, that we just choose teams. Mmm, and it's like a normal natural inclination that we can't escape no matter how logical you are. Like, even if you like a super logical person, you're still
There's some part of you that has an inclination towards teams. So how do you push yourself away from? It? Just kind of recognize what it is, like, Kno when it pops up and just got, this is a dumb row, but is that tough for you? Like, like, when you get shit on by one side specifically, and then the other side is like, you know, you're pretty cool. How hard is it for you to just stay even. It's okay. Like, I would shit on me, for sure. I really if I didn't know me. Yeah. For what? Exactly some
Comic, I would make fun of me. Totally. What would you say? Oh, I'd say terrible things
about steroid, use
insecurities being short of a lot of great jokes about my really a lot of fun. So you don't even do when people make fun of you. Do you care? Well, you can care but it's not going to change the way they think. Hmm. Looks like it's not good if you hear it, like if someone said it to my face about it, that's mean yeah, why you being mean to me? I mean, I don't even know you. Yeah, people will say mean things to you. Just try to get
Get a reaction out of you, but those people are usually way more dangerous than the average person that says something online. The average person says something online. It's like, you're not even connected. Like maybe you are. It's like you're like you're like you're trapped it cave. And is like a tunnel that goes up to the. Are you like fuck? Yeah.
Yeah, you're not
connected to that person. You're not in front of them. If someone is mean to you in front of you, that's a real problem. Yeah, and weirdness is when it spills over when people get used to
With people, the way they do on the internet and they try to do it in real life and you see it all the time, and Worldstar
videos just get fucked up because they think they can talk shit. Yeah, but they talk shit on the internet. They think they can just get away with it.
Like they don't have the same amount if you're if you're 24, and you lived in 1976 or if you're 24, and you live. Now, you got a totally different cut type of interaction with
people. Yeah, these fucking people are interacting with people in a
text form
60% of the time.
Time. Yeah, so, if that's a part of your development and everybody agrees, I'll agree that people who grow up in sort of like touching go environments. They're a little Slicker right called Street. Smarts people. Like, if you don't have any of that,
forget it. So your fuck. And if y'all to do this tax thing, you're not experiencing life, you're trapped in your
house, your trusted disconnect. You're sitting on the couch getting a fucking neck. Cramp because you're fucking texting. Yeah,
that's the people of
Day, that's what's weird about it. Yeah, you're not designed for that. Right? So the human brain has to find a way to catch up. All right, guys, we'll take a break for a second because this that motherfucking NBA Finals. Okay, you know, you're putting money down and why would you not want to win more money? You're not going to win more money than that, my bookie. I mean, it's very simple. I'll tell you why you deposit $200. They're going to give you $300 a gamble with that's crazy. You get to gamble with more money than you actually put down. That's how you win the most.
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Baseball, no matter the league, the matter, the minute, my book. He puts the action in your hands, so you can turn any game day into a Payday bet, anything anytime anywhere, with my bookie. Now, let's get back to the show. So, let me tie this back to. We talk about seeing all the hate etcetera would have him and CEO. What would you do? Differently about nothing? That's what I thought. That's what I was thinking. I wouldn't do anything different. I took the head but it's like to hit. Wasn't it? Wasn't bad? Because I was right. And eventually I knew they would realize I was right? And I would wish that he would realize I was,
right? And what I hate, I also felt people don't realize you.
Took a
hit. I think a lot of people's history of you is yes, you pull down and see him and you have the biggest podcast on the planet. That's true. Also. Yeah, they don't know what you went through afterwards. It wasn't bad. What was not bad. Bad things happen for Comic standards? I think it is. Well, I got banned from The Comedy Store, that was a, that was a real problem because it wasn't Mitzi Shores idea. The real problem was, I was on the phone with Mitzi, like more than an hour before. They called me to tell me. I was banned, so it was on the phone with me.
See and I told her how to respect what had happened. I said, Mitzi, I go. We are fucking tired of this guy stealing jokes. Like Carl's, are you sure? He's stealing them. It's, we have videos of it. It was a fucking thief. And so, we had this conversation on the phone and she goes, well, just keep away from him. So, I told her that we going to release this video. She goes, well, just keep away from I go. I'll do whatever you want me to do, and she goes. Okay, you want to go out tonight? And I said, sure, what time you want to put me up.
Up. She was all 10:30. I could thank you very much. I love you. That's the last time I talked to her now. I gotta call an hour later and I realized like she was in a state where mid sea Shores like, legitimately. If you looked at all of the people that are important in the development of Comedy. She's the number one. Most important person. That wasn't a comic. Well, number one way Twilight,
The
Comedy Store.
On The Comedy Store. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm so people. I'm sorry. Mitzi Shore is Pauly Shores. Mom. She's like she, she started the comic store with her husband. They got divorced. She got The Comedy Store and she ran The Comedy Store in a way, where she was a strong lady and she had fucking strong ideas about what was good. What was bad. She would tell you right to your face. She would tell you, I fucking hate that bitch. If she ever say that's
yes what?
She saying this bit about Anna Nicole Smith and her
husband. She fucking hated that bit because she'll J. Howard Marshall that dude. It was like yeah, I'm 50 years
old and by this bitch,
he was older than buying these barns dad. But but she was responsible for the environment at comedy store where she just left the comedian's, Express themselves, the best way that they could and give them a home and and and set these standards. And for those who
Sanders The Comedy Store prior? Yeah. Kinnison Tennyson, Bill Hicks. So many Legends David Letterman worked out there. Yeah, Eddie Griffin. You know, Damon Wayans. Was there a lot? Martin Lawrence? Is there a lot? It's like Dice Clay. Like so many people came out of that place and it was chaos and it didn't always work out perfectly, but she designed it in a way where she could create a place where these really fucked-up people could come and perform and she would call it her Island of Misfit Toys.
She knew what she was doing, man. And you know, you know, she's a nun. Completely unusual person. Why? There's nobody there. Very few people just dedicate themselves to a thing like that and like have this idea of like, what's the right way to do it and they're right. She was right. She's right. So often. Yeah, like someone call and complain about Kennison. She would I don't
give a fuck. The place is
packed every night. She did not give a fuck. But how is she?
With men. See you, then, because
this is why she didn't, she didn't know. And I also think she was having some legitimate health problems. Unfortunately. Yeah, when I first met her, she was already in 94, she was already struggling a little, and then, as time went on it, got worse. And I don't think if people don't come to her and complain. I don't think she necessarily knows, unless she's watching every single set who came up with this bit first. She doesn't know, right? So if
You just come down for 120 Minutes set and you see someone kill and you go. Oh my God, he's hilarious. If you had come 20 minutes before you might have saw, Paul Mooney do his version. All right, right. And if that was the case may be, then she would be able to go. Hey, what the fuck. But like I said it, then even the 90s. She was already struggling. You know, she had a, I think was a neurological disorder and it was hard for her, so I don't blame.
Her. But she had ideas that didn't necessarily work. But you fucking never know. What's going to work. How many people did we started out with that? We're like open my curs that youth. Think about that. I think about that new. You
knew that
and they just fucking they fell apart on re-entry. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Think about that like the first friend. I knew that there was a comic that stopped and they were funny too, but they just didn't want to go through it. This is a girl that I created when I was 21. I was a girl, I dated.
When we're both open mic receive other. She was funnier than me, but she was so funny. She was hilarious. She was fucking hilarious. Hmm, and I remember thinking if I don't make it as a comedian, at least I fucked her.
Yeah, this ladies and she's so good. She was a
killer and then what happened? I don't stop it. I don't know. I don't know. I lost track of any special touch with her friends, but
I want to know her name. Yeah, I moved to New York and what? I don't want to say it and when I moved to New York, it just stopped. Yeah, I'm back. Then. You had so few opportunities and if you didn't get one I imagine which is where you down because you're just toiling at that point like this internet. Shit is so different. It's so different. Well why I've been through both things. Yeah, and the what it really makes me understand like more than anything. It's like how important it is to like share.
Share success and like, get everybody out of that, horrible period in the beginning, where you don't know, if you're going to make it because the more people you can get that are convinced that they could be professionals. Yeah, the more you going to get those dues that we remember from the open mic days. It didn't make it. I think about that. Girl, the time I think about her. She was fucking funny, man. She was funny. She had a witty way of looking at things. Yeah, and I'm like, she was 21. We were both 21. I'm like, what would happen to her when she was 29? What if I want you 33? She might be.
Murderer right now. She might be straighten up. Slaying on Netflix. Yeah, selling out Arenas. Just walking out there
people.
She was that good but for whatever reason there's not there's no you know back then was dog eat dog and everybody. Yeah, they're going to be the host of The Tonight Show. Well, there was two shows. Yeah, and then maybe you get a half hour and then there was a sitcom game. Yeah, sitcom game. When Tim Allen got his show on Roseanne, got her show and Seinfeld and Brett Butler. Then the whole game became.
Came get a deal to do. Yeah. And craft of an act about this. It seems like a pilot. Yeah, like you would he would do an act. That was like a pilot for a sitcom and we all got Intoxicated by the sitcom world. Yeah. I don't know if he did it up. I mean, I love to show. But Ray Romano's with seem like looking back. It's like, oh, his whole comedy was Ray Romano was in. I love the character on news radio and he got fired. No, wait. Really? Yes, Ray Romano was the original handyman on news radio.
He got fired, why? Ray was a good friend of mine. I love until this day is good friend of mine. I love great. He's brilliant. And I opened for re at a bowling alley. Yeah, I think it's Jimmy's comedy Ali. I think that's what it was called, and queens. Yeah, like way back in the day and I remember sitting in the audience with my friend watching, Ray Romano. Just straight murder going. God. Damn. He's good. Yeah. He's so good. And then a year later we are.
In this situation where I have a development deal with NBC to do my own show, but then there's this other show that they've already shot a pilot for but they're going to fire this dude and you know, the own read for it. He's didn't test well no idea. I had no idea what he never found. But here's the good thing, they fired him and then hired another guy to do the pilot. So I was once
removed, I felt like
You did okay, by the way,
yeah. Well, then, you know, like Kevin James and I were good friends and he was good friends with Ray too. So we could go eat together and like, this was right when Ray was creating, Everybody Loves Raymond. Yeah, and he's like sitting there with like scripts and shit and talk to us. That motherfucker was obsessed. Good like that. Show became amazing because that dude was dedicated. We're at Jerry's. Famous Deli. Eaten Rubens.
Yeah. He's just going to watch.
We're running jokes.
Damn, it's too fired up. That's so amazing. Yeah, the best stand-up comedic actor I've ever seen like as a comedic actor and stand-up Santa primarily. He was a fucking great comedic actor. And, you know, just as important really good, dude. Yeah. What you expect is, what you get. Yeah, real solid, real cool. Dude. I was at, yeah, I was at the seller once and he's just like the calmest, Chile's guy, right? Like not high-energy. Nothing crazy. And we're seeing
Back table and we're talking about something. That was like, yeah, you know, I'm from New York, but I went to school out in California and I owe. Ya went to UC Santa Barbara and he goes here. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wild School wild school. And I was like, there's a lot of parties. He was. Oh no, my son went there during the school shooting.
His son
was at the school. Do you remember when there was a school shooting at UCSB know, his son was at the school during that there's so many school shootings now. Yeah, I can't.
Have you thought about no Alpha Brain here in America? Yeah, I think the problem is that it is a great way to get a lot of attention and to do the most horrific thing to a society that you feel like has abandoned you if you want to if you hate the world one of the worst things you could do is kill kids. Yeah. So that's the scariest thing for all of us. When you have children you'll have this feeling it's like the world becomes a completely different place.
and which is one of the things like I was thinking one of the things that happened to me when I became a parent and also be just as I became older and I watched children grow and become older and wiser and figure things out I realize we're all just babies that grew up and I used to meet a person I think all this guy's an idiot but now I look at someone I literally like I look at you and I think of you as a baby and I think of you going through your life and getting to who you are now
and it just instantaneously develops more empathy for ya hmm instantaneously yeah it's like it's a paradigm shift like a like the most profound psychedelic experience you could ever have yeah and it makes you realize that this whole thing that we do was like teams or other in people or this not you all that stuff is just fear it's a giant percentage of what we're doing when we're interacting with people poorly is just fear yeah
We're fear. We were fearful that they're going to be cruel to us. So we want to be cruel first. Yeah, and there's like chest-bumping. Most people just want to be loved. I remember talking to my cousin who's a psychiatrist and then I just started therapy, like, whatever. And I was like, oh, are we basically all just our personalities? Just adding up, all of our defense mechanisms may be like, yeah. That's basically you're just a bunch of defense mechanisms into a human being. Yeah. There's a lot of that because you're accustomed to in terms of your DNA. Your DNA is a
Custom to fighting off Predators fucking bears in Big Cats. That's that's our past all human beings. We didn't get here instantaneously. Yeah, we got here through a long, bloody horrific process where a lot of babies got eaten by Wolves. Mmm. That's why the Little Red Riding Hood all that shit was
something. Yeah. That's
why I was about wolves because wolves are see people.
You know, they stopped World War 1 because of wolves. No, do you know there's a cease fire, cease fire between the Russians and the Germans because so many of them were getting killed by wolves and they decided to list. They decided to decided to get together and kill the wolves and then go back to killing each other. No. Yes. I saw that. That picture of them playing soccer on Christmas the Christian doctrine. Yeah.
Because they were trapped. They were trapped in a crazy world and the world still crazy. It's just crazy with more information. Is it possible to indoctrinate people with like love for Country more now? You think like neural link?
That's just, well, that's the scary thing really way. Not, that's a scary thing about the neural link, right?
If you can control something is going on in someone's brain. Yeah, I'll need the news. I don't need influencers on Joe Rogan's if you can control it, but if it's
Something that can't be controlled. Well, how do they prove that? I don't know. Would you let them do it to you? Well, they're controlling things are ready. If you look at the if you look at the world like a system. Hmm and you looked at the amount of resources and money that's pumped into controlling specific narratives. It's are there already controlling thing but they're doing it because we choose to opt into our phone. Yeah, but you're not, it's not negotiable. Like what? You're not going to stop using your? No, I'm going to keep using my phone, but at least I can be like, oh, you're showing this because if I see an ad for fucking toaster ovens, maybe we spoke about toaster ovens. Yes.
Now I see that. But if you don't even have to convince me, at least there's one layer, but if you're already in here and you make me think I want to vote that way. You don't think that's a little bit. But how are you doing that? How you making someone? Think that they're going to vote a certain? If you can make my dad have memory again, if you could make, you know, and anybody do anything, you can make them think anything you want. I think there's a real problem with narratives, right is a real problem pushing narratives and not letting people really decide what's going on objectively, but I don't
don't, I don't know if any one person is ever going to have control of that. I think there's like this wave thing. That happens back and forth. It's like Twitter comes everything goes left and who knows if people abandoned that and go. Right? Yeah. Uno. Is this like this weird wild
sort of wrestling match of human beings trying
to figure out what the fuck dude. Yes. Society is just a bunch of over Corrections which way it seems. There's a lot of that. Yeah. There's a lot of that. Yeah. And a lot of those done.
Unfortunately, because of a lack of honesty, if more people were honest and we, we, we put like a lot of value and honesty and a lot of Honor in it that I think you could have like better conversations, of course. And we would find out why people are behaving the way they're behaving. But right now there's like a lot of like I want my team to win, so I'll bullshit about stuff. Yes. The problem with that is like my friend. Johnny, who used to compliment people that he didn't even like
Like you got to be able to do that. Yeah. Yeah, I'll do the other guy's a fucking dick, but you know, when you is what he does, he's an asshole, but his father, is they make the best fucking Pete. I'll go to his place. He would tell you shit like that. That's, that was fun. That's what I love about about stand up. Yeah, is that, like, even the guys that were assholes couldn't be denied as funny? Oh, no, like there was a guy. Do you ever know toddlin? I think he's oh yes, Pete and you know, he's pissed.
He is past right?
Yeah, so Todd Lynn, like was a fucking hilarious. I
didn't know for sure. But I know he had a spin baby arm had a baby. I've been dead. Yo, but I probably performed I want to his fundraising have I have a form of his fundraiser, Sauza toddlin and his family live on his fundraiser. Mark, Campbell closing Mark. So 5000 Mark. And this is one of his
good friends and Mark his passing on the bucket. This, how big of a dick toddlin was Marcos Pass around the bucket for people to donate. Money is like if you knew died, he wasn't necessarily the nicest
guy.
But
this motherfucker was so goddamn funny really bro. Oh, he's a monster dude bro. Shit on me for bomb in front of him and then just crushed for and he had a baby arm. Yeah. He
had like a baby on like no no. Like, you know, yeah. Yeah that and he
was still talking. That shit was so funny. But everybody soon ass on there's a lot of people like this like Patrice has the greatest I've ever seen my favorite but a lot of people would be ideal Patrice was kind of an asshole, but you couldn't deny him Patrice was an asshole to everybody. That's, yeah.
That's why he's always nice to be. Yeah, cuz he thought you were a real one, bro. These nice Patrice was nice. He was just you had to be able, don't bullshit a joke. You had to be able to take a joke. Yeah, we'll take it right out of chin laughs right back while what? Do you say Joe? Oh, he was always funny. Always. He was just always funny about everything. He Patrice had a way of looking at things where we would all talk and they would wait for patrice's
Point
guys. If you talk to Patrice and hung out with them, I'll hang out with him in Vegas once we were all
At the backstage at one of those Opie and Anthony show. It was just such. I've met, I remember hanging out with going man. I wish I lived closer to him. Yep. Yep. Who's that guy? You know? Yeah, but luckily, I had Joey Diaz. Joey, did always your guys Coast Patrice.
Yeah.
He was very much like that. Joey Diaz was very much like that. Like we would all line up the back of the room with Joey Diaz was light. It on fire. Yeah, and all the people I've ever seen kill. I never seen. Anybody hit Joey Diaz. RPMs he
He would have these bits that they were so funny that you couldn't. He could say things, you weren't allowed to say. Yeah, because he was like a human cartoon. He did you weren't even sure if he was real.
Yeah, because it's got white, he was fucking perfect
and he would nail punch lines and turned beet red and people would be falling out of their seat. Yeah, as multiple times. I've been in that original room where I go. God. I wish we were filming this. Yeah. I wish we were filming us because I don't think I don't think.
Buddy's gonna understand if they're not here right now, you know, you know for him just put out his special. Yeah, and shouts. Happy feel-good. Check out hat trick, but that's that idea for the special. That's what I wanted to see. I want to see Joey do that too. And I because Joey for me, I was like, you have to understand him within the space of the store. Yeah, like he the I don't know, something magical about it and I didn't understand until I went out there and I saw him for the first time you have been telling me a lot about him, and I remember just sitting and watching and it was a yeah, it was
Special man, I'm working with Joey and Atlantic City, this weekend for the first time in years. I haven't been on stage with him and like to but I gotta watch. Yeah, I do. I told him, like, you did whatever you want to do. What, what do I have to do? If I can get you back in there, like, to is this his first time back on snow know, he's been on stage a bunch of times. Okay, good. He did a bunch of shows with Bryan Callen and he's tuned up. He's ready to rock. I'm so excited. Yeah, I can't believe God, I'm back. Yeah, it's always a fucking beast. He was like,
You have like specific roles as like these communities, you know, and The Comedy Store Community. Joey Diaz was just pure chaos, who just you a drop them in and like, enduring, like the the drug Joey days. Like, during the early days, when he was like a straight-up criminal. He reminded me so much of my friend, Johnny so much. Johnny who's Joel hasta? The pool hustle up for us. Joey was like just like him. Yeah. Like a wild do from the streets but like a good dude. Yeah, like I knew he was a Gilligan.
It's solid dude, and we were friends like instantly and he would come to the news radio set and he was a gorilla back that, I mean, he was like, you know, way thinner
and like yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was wearing a leather jacket, building a football player and all this NBC Studios because he was eating all of them snacks. What the mid-size Louis,
I would love to.
He was. Yeah, he's always in and out of jail. I think it was like running from
something in Seattle. He had to come back to LA. Like there's a warrant out for you. Couldn't get a passport to go places because all the crap, he kidnapped a drug dealer. The machine gun fire. Wow. No Joey Diaz did Real Time. Joey Diaz is but he's a uniquely beautiful soul. And even though I knew all that shit that he did real time and everything. I knew I'm like, I know what you are. I know what you are, what your a great.
Guy who just had a crazy life. You collect these
guys. Just these guys are valuable their
everything, the life, man. There's does. Those are Sam. Kinnison's. Those are the Richard Pryor's, the, why do you think? Because they just, they don't fit in and that's how you see what it is for real? Like if you're not a part of it. You see what it is for real
because you don't have to operate your based on the part of the system. Yeah, we
did has found his mother dead on the floor when he was on acid now, that's what he was like, 14 years old. Yeah. Well,
yeah, when Europe
You need
your fucking, your goose bumps. Just stand up, you like what? Yeah. Well, so it's like those type of people from that angst and that unusual view of the world have to find themselves. Yes, and sometimes themselves as a little outside of the norm. It's outside of the group. They find it through the most potent form of entertainment. Yeah. All of our great rock stars, all of our great Comics, all of our great hit.
Hip-hop artist all of them. Come from crazy backgrounds. Not all of them. Obviously. It's big
generalization. I'm trying to make my point now. I understand what you're saying. I
think they don't get Joey Diaz in a suburb. Yeah, but more. It's like there's a there's a freedom to being outside if you're willing to harness. Yes, and the freedom is you get to actually find who you are. Well, the reality is there's no real outside, like people feel like they're outside. But so many people feel like they're outside. There's a
Of
people. And when you go to a comedy club, all the other people also feel like they don't get it. They laugh at your point there. Oh, yes.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And even if it's what you're
saying is wrong, but it's funny thing. It's like that's where it's like we're fucking with the wiring, one of my favorite bits that you do is that bitchy do about countries where they treat their women Tara
last food. Boy.
He's like you look, if you
were a terrible person, you wanted to misrepresent who you are. It would
write that all. This is just saying that women belong in the kitchen. Yeah. Yeah, it's not what they're
saying. No, it's not what you're saying. You're saying something funny. It's funny thing to say, I was trying to, I did this talk, like, known from the Comedy Cellar. Do you know? No. Yeah. You would love nothing. Like yeah. Okay, good. I worked at Subway,
ways. I know. But he's like, getting, he's an
Using
nine. Just you connect you with. No, I'm
not. I'm gonna try the colonies all.
Shout out to all these Comedy Club own, but without them, he had an interesting conversation. He had this like talk, whether these like intellectual dudes is guy named. Glenn Lowry. Do you know. Yeah. Yeah, so him and a few other dudes, and, and then, some comics on stage, and we were just talking about, you know, random things and comedy, and political correctness, and culture Etc.
And there was like, just it was just like a moment on stage where I was talking like, we should never be together. Like we don't have to have these conversations because you guys say was, right? And we say it was funny. And I think what happens is the people that say, what's right, expect, the people say, it was funny to be, right? And that's where our jokes become more than jokes and what we get in trouble. If we're just out here, just making jokes and talking shit and just being funny with no Stakes. That's when people look at us and they're like, oh no, these are the next intellectuals. They are going to tell us how to think.
That's when we can't make the craziest jokes. Well, one of the arguments is that like, if you say crazy things in the name of being funny than other people that are not as smart as you will say those things and they'll be hurtful. They'll feel like they have license to say those things. Maybe. I had a drag queen. Tell me that after show, maybe it was very intimidating. Hmm. She's wearing kiss boots, but it's one of those things. Like, I don't know if you're responsible for the dumbest people in your or not. I don't know how that works.
I feel like at a certain point in time. We have to agree that we most people love comedy. If you don't love comedy, you have to opt out of this conversation. So, if you love comedy, you must agree that a lot of what people say, they don't mean, they just think it's a funny thing to say like, this is an or just like Quentin. Tarantino is not really killing women when he's making Once Upon a Time and Elizabeth. I'm sorry about no dead. Women involved in the production of that movie, correct. The violent movies, violent rap you and him getting all those things.
Move toward comedy. It'll move on but it's also like it's the problem is it seems like you're just talking hmm. It seems like it's not like something you've created that you've manipulated language in order to get a surprise result. The makes people go by. Yeah, and it seems like your statements because they sound just like everybody else when they talk. Yes, but I also think it's because that's how we feel and we can have wrong feelings and I think that's the biggest difference. What's wrong though.
You feel it. Not like you don't have somebody might cut you
off in traffic and you might think the worst
possible thing for that car. And then three seconds later you go.
I was just upset in the moment.
There's I mean don't don't really get out of, don't people? Like oh, yeah, they don't get life in jail for murdering somebody because they had moments of rage. You know what? That's from temporary.
Insanity temporary insanity. Do you know what? That that's what comedy
is temporary. Insanity? This is my crazy thought in the moment and then I'm going to say it again and it's going to be funny, but I don't feel that way anymore.
Simple as that, what do you say?
Comedy separate.
My funniest moment, my funniest thought and might need York reaction to something. And I'm going to craft it and AdWords and add ideas and wrap myself around and know what was
marijuana. Might not be pleased. We went know you're trying to defend some insufferable position, you know, the joke about the woman food that I don't think you should. I don't think you should actually sink.
No, that's a great word. You didn't throw people off your Trail. It's like it's like covering your tracks when leaves crab. It's not a secret to solid word for trying to be deceptive, you know, trying to enforce K, top Escape. Whatever. Let's go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck it. Yeah, fuck it, dude. Let's just make the jokes who gives
a fuck what anybody says about it. They were
To write think pieces, who gives a fuck
right? Well, the thing is it's like they
represent a valid group of humans who have their opinions, but the problem is if they try to impose those opinions on people who have different opinions. So there's some people who love, shit-talking comedy. Yes. That's what we do. Yes. All right, if you want to pretend that everything I have to say, I always mean I'm checking out. I'm not interested in doing that. Yeah. I'll I want to talk to same way. I talk around my friends. Yeah. I want to talk the same way I talk around.
Yeah, we know, we're all having fun and talking shit. And I want to do that to the moment. They say ladies and gentlemen, Joe
Rogan. Hey,
what's up? I want to talk to those people are gonna talk to my best friend's. I want to develop bits that are as funny as I can make them. And I don't mean all the things I'm saying, but I'm going to, I'm going to hit you with the best shit. I have fun. He's in the outcast, whether that's like the person on a TV show. That's a weird or the thought that's thought. That should get you out. Can like kinnison, use the ultimate outcast.
Right. We're at a brain, a trench coat yelling at you screaming. Used to be a preacher. What the fuck happened to this guy? Ultimate Outcast? What fucking class of people to he does he fit into, he's out of the Christians. He's gone. Like, where is it written? In Hollywood? He's like five foot four. He's fat as fuck. Is wears a Beret. Yeah. He's got a trench coat on, but when that dude would get on stage, you be like, whoa. What is this? A new kind of Comedy? Hmm. What the fuck is going on? At all the people that have ever like, like
Completely ignited, a completely different style of Comedy. He's my number one. Really? Yeah, man, he's out of nowhere, he's doing this wild screaming yelling, like passionate preacher comedy. Yeah. He was doing a fucking Tent, Revival preacher comedy, right? That's what he did. It was one of his favorites which kind of makes sense too, because they're both essentially preaching.
Yes. Yes, but
Brock, he's one of Rock's favorites because rocks.
Psalm and like the 86-88 era. Hmm. I saw him in 88. I got to some 88 was he was on the slide and this is as a lifelong. Die-hard Sam, Kinison? Phantom not saying this in any disrespect. I think he's one of the greatest of all time, but I think you have to judge Comics as like the highest RPMs the achieve. Just the same way. You have to judge Fighters when people say, who's one of the greatest, heavyweights of all time in boxing. I say Mike Tyson, because Mike
During his day was a fucking destroy. Yeah, and maybe it only lasted a few years but he's the guy who comes to mind for me because I grew up during the era. Where Mike Tyson was the execution. Yeah. So I feel like that about almost everything like, almost everything has to be judged by the, like the errors, in which it happened. Don't you think that that's the case? Yeah. And from my money Sam Kinison. During that era was just a fucking new thing. Nobody would say anything.
Like that, does this guy with a fucking trench coat and a beret and he's screaming about going to hell and how Satan is going to be long? You been married. This is normal to, you will show you the place where he tortured Souls, huh? Yeah, he had this thing where he would scream at the audience.
Yeah. I've been married twice. How would be like clock mad? His fat guy screaming,
hell would be like Club Med. I've been married twice. Yeah.
It was like, no one had seen anything like yeah, and he had like knowledge of the Bible. That's The Who do like biblical knowledge in the middle of bits? Like if Bill Hicks was funny.
Oh my God, shut your mouth. That's not the only smarter
really murder. Its ability to commit
suicide. I hate that guy really? Maybe I hate
his fans but like people are still walk around like Bill Hicks. Was the great. It's like come on. I'll tell you what. Any you like listen to me Matt when there was a fucking great.
In room with the punchline Atlanta and it had someone, everyone graffitied all the walls and one part. It said, quit trying to be Hicks. Yeah, he had his
true because he
made you feel like you were doing something stupid. You were so jealous of him. And so I got it. I was lucky. I got a chance to see him when I was an open mic. ER, so I was just starting out and I saw him twice and one time he murdered and one time he bumps. I mean, it was amazing. It was amazing. And me and Greg Fitzsimmons.
And a couple other Comics, I don't think of doing it anymore. We're on the back of, Nick's calmly stopped and he went on after the dude, who was a very regionally funny, middle act very, you know, obvious premises, but did a good job. Had a good set and Bill Hicks. 8, cock, he ate cock for the, the majority of his set, and people are just getting up and leaving getting up and leaving and while he was doing this bit about,
It was some bit about someone taking a shit. So he's in the middle middle of taking a shit. I forgot exact. I don't to butcher it and the middle of taking a shit. He's like, yeah, it looks up. He goes this usually clears a room and people are like leaving in droves. Just like a 300 person room, by the end of it. There's maybe 50 people, and maybe ten comedians were fucking crying laughing, and he never looks phased. He never looked faced, and we were howling and we weren't howling. Ironically.
We're howling because it shit was funny. It was just so dark. Yeah, it was so crazy. It was it was like some of his stuff was so funny. It was just it was different than any other kind of Comedy. So it was like, comedy from a dude who recently did mushrooms and was re-evaluating everything and that was like pretty much what was actually going on with Bill. Yeah, and then he quit doing drugs and he just dedicated himself to like getting like messages out in comedy and the problem is back then.
No, one had a fucking podcast man. So you had to be funny. And if you had something to you felt like people need to know about it. You got to feed, you got to figure out how to put that into comedy to complicate. Yeah, makes people preachy. That's what okay, that's it.
So I do I do it but doesn't that
happen to Comics as they get better as I get more famous, as they get more successful. They become more. Preachy watch Louis c.k., He's not preachy. Yeah, Louis is a game Chappelle is not preachy? Dave, Chappelle is
expressive. He wants you to know exactly how he feels about things, but he's the biggest comic alive. He's not preaching. Yeah, I think a bit, I hate that noise.
What are you
thinking? Trying to express himself in the most honest and, and, and compassionate way possible. He's a beautiful person. He's one of the nicest people I've ever met in my life. Like genuinely always nice. Yeah, very rarely angry at any even if he's mad at someone is trying to ruin his career. He'll have a joke.
To about it and then like
back and then
never sought. Everyone's laughing. Have you seen Jamie Foxx's? It's so good. So good. So good. We talked about this is Jamie the most talented Entertainer maybe ever. Maybe. Maybe ever maybe ever Impressions. Yeah, singing he can play the piano. Yes, we can do anything. He's one of those people that can literally do anything. Yeah. Here's the, if you want
to run about, yeah, run it back because it's so preposterous.
I was incensed. I was insane. I mean that's
if you blindfolded me and go. Oh, that's uh, probably yeah. Now do you stupid names?
That. Yeah, so good. That's so good. It's for pasta. I wanted, I want the Jamie Foxx documentary. He just done everything like his life. Is so fascinating. You know what I think his work speaks for itself. What do you mean? I mean, I don't want to I don't need a
documentary like that. Dude. I need that, dude. I don't want to
interrupt keep going, do whatever the fuck you want to do. I want to see what how he plays Mike Tyson. He's gonna play, Mike Tyson. I bet it's going to be phenomenal. He doesn't amazing. Mike Tyson impression. Yeah, and he also,
Also is of that age who grew up during the time when Mike Tyson was the Dominator. Yeah, so he knows what that really was. Like, it's like you're not recreating that we experienced that. Yeah. Why do you fight Tyson fought Bruce Seldon? The Bruce Seldon looked like a comic book superhero and you can see the fear in his eyes. When he fought Mike Tyson you just Mike Tyson just looking at you like there is not a chance in the world that you're going to survive. Oh hells. Yeah. We got we got some what?
Got a
legend pegan. Looks like a lot of fun. If you hate your body.
I love it. Don't get me wrong. I wish I could have some. No, I'm good. I would if I was hungry, and I didn't have dinner dinner,
reservations. Let me get a plain fucking eat. The shit out of that pizza, Joe. We got to wrap this up bro, please let us is an honor to be here. My new studio. Thank you so much for all your. Thank you, man. My pleasure.
Well, people need to know you were
great. They know you great, but
I don't think they know how grateful. I, I think it's very, very rare that people in your position or this benevolent. And I think that you set a tone that the rest of us try to follow, that's so nice of you. But I think it's good for everybody. I know you think it's good for everybody, but I think that like,
If the guy on top is doing it and you don't do it. You're a piece of shit. Hmm, right? And I think that most people on top don't do it and that's how they get to the top. And I think that's what was so profound about what happened with you. Is that everybody underneath. You was like know, I kind of look out for my boys. I got to put them on a path forward Builders thing. Exactly. Yeah, they all took the same sort of strategy. Yes. Yes. It was just the right path. It was just like I saw that path, you know, it was just it was just the right path. It's not like a big deal in terms of
Well what it really is is what we should have been doing all along but we were all like scratching and clawing to try to get Hollywood gigs, you know, and I think once the internet came along a game comedians is to completely new network of everybody became an asset. Not just like a competitor, but competitor is good. Like if you trained at a Jiu-Jitsu gym, you want to train at a place that has black belts because you want to be able to get to a really high level and you want to know
If your stuff is bullshit, right, so if you pull something off and you can pull it off on a purple belt with a black belt, keeps fucking it up. That might be bullshit. Yep, and you don't find that out. Like the same with comedy. Comedy doesn't exist in a vacuum. Yeah, you go to a place that doesn't have a comedy community. You never find the best comic in the world. They just, it's always say, never, but it's super rare if that's ever happened. I don't think it ever has the fucking new art form, right? We are really clearly indebted to each other. Yep, and the only way to recognize that,
Is to reach out to each other and to say it and and to just like Express. I try to express it all the time when I'm in my green room before my shows. I'm like, we are so lucky. We're so lucky. We could do this. This is the craziest thing in the world that all the time. Beautiful gratitude is it sounds like wouldn't beads and crystals but it's fucking real. Yeah, that shit's real gratitude is real. It's like you're putting an energy out there that makes people feel good and it makes me want to do the same. Yeah. No, I agree with you.
That is something we realize that until you. Yeah, I think. Yeah, I think you do you made people? I think you guilted people into liking something. I think you were doing it. So somebody else didn't do it. There was under you the that made me put you put them on or somebody else is trying to emulate you they're going. All right. Well Joe's doing it. I got to also do this and then when somebody starts to do it's like the altruism kick in there's a dopamine release for altruism. Yeah, someone else you start to feel good. And then you do that and you're like, oh my God, I really enjoy doing this. That's the thing that people
Need to realize like being nice is great. Good. Feels good to everybody eat when you make people feel good. You feel good too. Yeah, you know, it's good for all parties involved the son of selfish, you know, one way Endeavor if someone gets success it should be good for you too. Should be happy for them. And they're happier, you're happy and everyone's happy and we could all like sort of like go through this weird thing together because we don't know what this is, you know, every day you wake up and you try to pretend like
All of it makes sense, but you fucking shut your brain off every night. And you we go black for like eight hours, leave gone in another dimension. And then you bring, you wake up in the morning and pretend that any of that shit makes
anything as we're so accustomed to going unconscious. Yeah,
literally having dreams having dry. I had a dream that I was spearfishing in a fucking tunnel. That was in a cave where there was a Mayan artifacts. What the fuck is that? What is
that?
But it was visited in the dream. It was
Vivid. It was like the eye could see the paint and the golden red paint on these artifacts. Like this is wild. We're in a cave system. Spearfishing. Wake up. Nope. Back in Texas. They just go about your day. Yeah, like it did
that my day. Like I wasn't just
living in another world. Yeah, we we
we're all going through this. This is
craziness. Yeah.
Are the aliens real or not. Tell me, right? I don't know. We're
going to find out, you know, the first time we ever hung out.
This is after we did the podcast. Yeah, tell him we went out to dinner. Anybody knows about this. They might not you tell me. Hey, what are you doing for dinner tonight? After I do the pot and I'm like, well, shit, I don't have any plans on La, he will come to Jeremy at the what is it? The all-you-can-eat Brazilian restaurant. What's it called going to shop Fogo de Chao. He goes come to Fogo de Chao. And the when you type it, I don't even know what food we are
going to do that, right? It's like, okay. It's a Brazilian
restaurant. So we go and you're like, we're going to come with this with Bob. I go. Okay, cool. And we go
Bob Lazar, this is the guy who is was working on the u.s. Explain to you who he was because I wanted you to get a read on. Yeah, because I wanted you to decide whether or not you thought it was bullshit. This is a guy that was allegedly according to him, a back engineered alien spacecrafts. He had area as for mmm. It was a guy who worked for Lockheed Martin and he claims he worked on these UFOs and we all went out.
Out to dinner for her child and we're sitting there and and and Andrew and I are cutting meat and eating and just
talking I got my green light on, they keep coming around this
guy. Jose like put the fucking red light on you had enough. Take
whatever the fuck. I don't know the rules of Poker it yeah, get a green
card. It's the best fucking place ever. If you love me. You have a green card on one side and it's red on the other side. And so when you want to keep that food roll and you keep that green up, but Ang is it is
like fucking thank you for coming. He said he'd chicken legs.
You gotta flip it over if you gotta tap out that's gonna
give you a break. Yeah, so you flip it over. It's a good system. So we're are certain. They are eating and Bob Lazar is detailing to us shit that he couldn't even talk about on the podcast. Wow, and explaining like what what they were trying. But grudgingly, by the way, the grudge, and that's what kind of convinced me. He was like, I don't care to argue about this or debate about this. Like, if you don't believe me, it's fine. I don't need to be here because I don't even care. Yeah, when we kept saying that, yeah, and then he was like, this is what I experienced.
And all our little bit. You dedicate your whole life to that. No, he didn't dedicated life. Like he was an engineer, was only there for a short period of time and here's where it gets Wild One. Hear the whole story. Yeah. He had top secret clearance because he has to work on these crafts allegedly according to him. But because of that, they have a tap into his phones. They had a monitor, all this discussions. Like if he's selling information to the Russians, they got it. Okay, so during that time period, his wife is having an affair and they they kill his top secret clearance.
And suspend him during this time period, and with no explanation because they think he'll be emotionally unstable, unstable. You can't have a guy like that working on fucking
you. Okay, so, they don't tell
him though. They don't tell him, his wife is cheating on him. So he trying to figure out what the fuck is going on, and he brings friends out into the mountains, to view the launches of these UFOs. Because they're on a very specific schedule and he knows the schedule. So, he takes these people out deep into the Nevada desert, which is now the area.
He took people to, you can't even go there anymore. It's now off limits. But at the time, you can go there and he was watching with his friends. They're filming these fucking things flying around and like these Preposterous ways that no airplane can fly. Did you see any of the videos? I've seen it. But you don't know what you're looking at. Ya like, you're looking at lights, like it could be anything. That was the Elan thing. I've, yeah, you want some shit like, why do they have a better camera footage of a? Yeah, but they do he's not totally correct. The Fleer footage that they have from the David favor.
The commander David favor had one of the most impactful UFO video and counters that that's ever happened. It was off the coast of San Diego and they did they found this thing that moved from 50,000 feet above sea level? 250 in less than a second. They don't know what it is. They have no idea what it was, but it was actively monitoring them because it blocked all their tracking devices which is technically an act of war and then just fucking just took off gone and
Back to their cat point, which is the place where they had like, they had like a designated spot with a supposed to meet up during this Mission because what they're doing with this mission is as a training Mission and they have dedicate in that fucking UFO. Went to that spot. It's like I know where you're going. Bitch took off again and gone and then when they relayed this to the Nimitz, he was explaining how the people that were working. There were like we see these things like every couple weeks. We have no idea what the fuck it is. We don't know. What's your 100% convinced UFOs? I'm not because it could be a
Drone that they don't tell those people about. It could be something that the government's working on
could be different going. Most
likely us see the thing about communism is like it. Like the way they do it over there is like /. Communism / capitalism. Maybe that works but a lot of what they do is they steal. They still a lot of intellectual property from United States. One of the problems. There's not a problem with United States stealing intellectual property from China. As far as I know. It doesn't make the news but they banned Huawei the reason why they banned Huawei cell phone.
Right. The company that makes the it make modems as well to make many things but they found like enough of an indication that they're suspicious. There's some back doors in order to get data. So if you using like Huawei devices and you have some like super secure network that's developing nuclear weapons, or whatever the fuck you're doing, then we get all that data. So
there's like that. Chill the fuck out,
you know, we're in this weird time where we're only like a decade or so away from nothing being a secret ever.
He meant there'll be no more secrets. You'll be able to read minds you. You're coming to a place where language is probably going to be Universal. And you're going to be able to communicate with people that are nowhere near you using the power of your thought. This is the neural link. This is many of these Technologies. They're developing if you had to think about where it's going to go, that's where it's going to go. That's one guy, talk to, you said that's the endpoint of AI. That's Where It's all headed. We're all in one conscious. Well, it might be you gave me a broken glass. You cock.
Almost caught myself. What did I? Wow, if you please the Russians, please,
it was
no big deal. You drink out of this and I drink out of that and yeah, check her, right? This part. What were just talking about the Russians group Consciousness? No group Consciousness and Singularity
what they're looking for. Don't worry about
water, Andrew fingers and
what state for the record that most is podcast is nonsense.
Yeah, I would say, 100% as 100. We like to be safe and just go 100% percent insult comedy. Yeah, I if asked, I stand by none of my claims now, we're, this is all scripted. This is a scripted podcast, and this is for your parrot e-exactly.
Okay, but with the five dudes, drunk with the UFO shit, right?
For
they're out there. They're out there, bro. Say you believe
it do. The thing is I don't believe it because I don't know for sure. But if I had to guess, I would have to say most likely they're out there because there's not enough options. Like if you had to think that this is the most unique circumstance ever in the history of the universe. The problem with that is the universe is too big. Yeah, so it's so big that everything that's ever existed including everything that's ever happened on Earth in the
Max. Same order has happened in infinite number of times. You have to understand what Infinity means. It's too big for anybody to understand. So are there aliens? Of course, there's not just aliens out there. You're out there. You're not just out there. Once you're out there in impossible number of times and you're doing life, all kinds of different ways. The number of people that live exactly the same as you have with every pause every mistake.
Steak, every success. All of it is exactly the same. It's infinite. That's how big the universe and there's also on. That's the opposite. Yes. Failures, disgrace, everything. Falling apart, murder-suicide. All of it. Probably every single iteration of human beings. Egan you out there Joe? And that motherfucker's, that's where you cross the
line. Yeah. I just wonder,
man, if you watched a moose stomping person to death. You think it eat that moves.
Joe, allsop the
moose's dick and good. Understand about Predator this mouth.
Well, now that a predator, dog,
take some mushrooms out, guys. Yeah, you are, you need something like massage or something, something therapeutic yoga class. Is this married life? Joe is his married life.
Well, listen and this bitch. Listen, we love you, bro. We
Love you, too. I appreciate you guys. And I'm very, very happy that there's so many of us out there. You know, this is an interesting time because none of us would have ever had a show like this. Yeah, or like, any of the shows that we do if it was up to Gatekeepers, that's true. Wouldn't happen. Yeah, it would have never said, yes, that's true. It would have never left you alone. Like some of the shit that you say, you know, to never let you alone hundred percent. There's no way. And the only way to do this is do it this way. Yes, you got to just kind of and we're very grateful.
For for you because of this. Well, listen, I'm grateful that exists.
And, you know, I do remember happened was
Comedy Corner. Yeah. Sure. Somebody got company closing. Yeah, they're probably all like, that's when I knew something was happening with you. The me, like, you were doing shows there. Right? Like, you would have like a live show or something there, and it was this little place off Melrose or something like that. Right? And like this is, no, no, this is like live, like, stand up. But like, this is when you were maybe not working this or something. I was banned from Stan from the store, but you were like selling out these shows.
So because the podcast I heard that and I was like, wait a minute, like something is going on here. There are people who can't sell out shows at comedy clubs. They're giving away tickets. And this guys doing a comedy show and it was a restaurant, / comedy club, and people got some podcasts back then, are you sure? Yeah, because the podcast was 2009 and maybe that was 2009, maybe. But I was banned from the store in 2007. I thought it was off. I thought I was off podcast because I was like, there's something happening with commandeer your hole.
No, I'm not. I don't know the
timeline. But the more, I'm thinking about him, like, it might be right. It's hard to say. It's like, but that time error, like Sal's comedy whole was a good one. The ice house was a big one. That was our real like safety wrap. Such a fun Club do great Club. Great Club. Is that back open again? I don't know. I haven't been in La so I suppose that the ice house was our spot in the haha. We did the haha, lot. And did The Improv a lot, you know.
Anyway, I just remember that happening. I remember seeing like oh shit like you could create your own community and people want this, they want this distraction want to convey the with the conversation and I don't have to do these shows on MTV or whatever fucking networks. I was working on. I remember seeing that and I was like, okay. Yeah, something's happen right here. Well you create you do create your own Community, but what you do is just find other people that are doing the same stuff that you're doing. Yeah, and just like everybody, like everybody is creating their own Community, you just like, have you
Join, yeah, he joined together. But you know, no one person really does it and it's your responsibility. If you're the person that's at like you're further along in your career or further along in the weirdness of the path. And in terms of like the amount of people that are following you you you it's your it's your obligation. You have to bring everybody along like hey, yeah, we don't need that anymore. Those sitcoms are ruining your horrible jokes. Yeah. Thanks. You can't tell. Terrible jokes. If you want to get a sitcom because there's a bunch of fucking trolls out there.
That'll get you fired. Yeah, and they'll take away your livelihood, right? Okay, then before you leave, like what is your? We looking at you? What is your, what is your recommendation for? How do we do for New York, what you did for LA and then all you're doing it already, man, you're already doing it. Well, you're doing here is perfect. This is a perfect example, a perfect, like expression of you and of you, and if you got it, everybody that works here. It's like you're doing it. And
Doing it with your stand up. You're doing it with your specials, just keep doing it, and it'll get better. And you'll find, you know, like smoother ways to do it. You're going to continue this weird path that we're all on. Like. I feel like I get better at doing podcast every day. I feel like every time I do it. I got a little bit better. And I know that sounds crazy, but I just think that we can Define ourselves in like a confining way for no reason. We decide well about as good as I ever got to get it this but that's not really true, but you can get better.
Oh, and I still fuck up. Like sometimes I'll talk over some of them like yeah. Fuck like I didn't want to I just it just blurt it out. Like controls settle down. I try to figure out how to get the most out of this person. Yeah, and it just gets better all the time. And it's like everything else you do. It's the amount of energy you put into it. The amount of focus you put into it. If you put a lot into it, you can get better at it. As long as you're alive. So long as you're alive and you're healthy put a lot into it. Yeah.
Joe
Rogan dirty. Thank you so much, brother, pleasure, brother. I appreciate
you. Give some shows you like to promote it.
Are we good?
Appreciate you, appreciate you. Thank you. You
guys are very important to me. Like, all you guys coming up. Its soup is super important to me. It's beautiful. It means a lot. It feels good. It's nice. It's like, there's a, there's a whole fucking Savage crew of like, really good Comics coming up right now, or spend. They're doing real comedy and it's heartwarming for me. You know, when I watch you, and I watch you. And I watched saying Shane Gillis Norman, and he says, so many of these guys that are coming.
Tim Dylan to make some of these guys are coming up. I'm like, goddamn, Tony Hinchcliffe. This is a great time, is a great time for real comedy and Ari. Shaffir said it. Best said, this is the best thing because comedy is dangerous now, comedy. I agree. One more time is dangerous again. Yeah. Yeah, we want there to be a time where you can't say things. Yeah, because that's when we're fun.
Cancer weird word when you're not supposed to say things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you can't, you can't do
that. Right. The problem is most of the people that tell you, the
people that want to tell people, they can't say almost all of them are a mess, but he
There's no amazing examples of people who want to tell you what, you can't say. There's no examples. We look at that person, you know, their kind and compassionate, and their charitable and they're beautiful. They always look at the bright side of things. There's no examples. They're just angry. What about Amy Schumer,
son of a bitch. Ladies and gentlemen, be here. Here's Bob with the weather.
